The Cloud Rider

Happy Easter :)

2009-04-12T03:26:00.001-07:00

I actually had Black Saturday reflections ready but my internet sucks so I couldn't post them on time. For that day, I read the Acts of the Apostles, and I realized how wonderful it was to be part of the early Christian community. I'd like to think YFC is modeled a lot after those early communities, empowered by the Spirit, motivated to bring the word of God to the ends of the earth. Especially in times when the community discerns its course, I remember how our own YFC leaders discern the course of the organization.

I didn't really get to read anything today for Easter. I knew I didn't have to read about the joy of the disciples when the one clearest sign that theirs was the one true faith (although I don't think they needed the vindication) was to find Jesus alive and kicking. I knew God put a lot of reminders of that great joy of the Risen Christ in my life -- in my family, my friends, the people I love, my entire life. I don't need to look for that joy in any manuscript -- I'm experiencing it everyday of my life, the awesome love of God.

What I did do was to start making Easter resolutions. It made sense because after all that reflecting, I knew I had to act on the things I found out about myself. I won't post them here but I pray God grants me the grace to actually carry out these things.

Summer classes begin in two days, Sanggu work began for me this morning, YFC work began for me yesterday, the work of being a Christian is a 24/7 job. I'm just thankful for that brief but meaningful respite I got, probably the most meaningful Lent I had in my life.

Happy Easter everyone. Thank you for magnifying the joy of the Risen Christ in my life :)

Something to Remember 20

2009-04-10T02:49:00.001-07:00

Today, I decided to read the accounts on the Passion of Christ in Luke and John. They were a bit contrasting in perspective, but I took them as complementary in imagining Christ and the situation at that time. Luke was presenting a more human Jesus while John was emphasizing the divinity of Jesus. But in both accounts, the other characters were the same.

Here are my reflections on the characters of the account:

(1) Jesus, in Luke, was depicted as having finally understood the gravity of His destiny, was in so much agony over it that He asks the Father to take the cup away from Him if it be His will. But God responds with a sign of strengthening, and though Jesus rightly was feeling pain and sorrow, He did not let this hinder Him from fulfilling the Father’s will. As a man, He was acting in total surrender to the will of God.

And yet despite this terrible agony, He never just looked to Himself but to the people He loved. In John, He spends His last moments before the passion praying for them. In Luke, He prepares them, though in vain because the disciples didn’t understand Him, for the mission ahead.

Once crucified, in Luke, He asks forgiveness for the very people who were hurting Him when it would be understandable for any human to cry out for anguish and justice. In John, already on the cross, He didn’t spend His last moments with His mother sharing goodbyes or signs of affection, but instead, entrusted her to a disciple.

These acts of selflessness together with the final act of selfless love, His innocent death on the cross for us, against the backdrop of all the persecution, mocking and pain that Jesus had to endure just fills me with so much gratitude. That even before I was born into history, my God had already paid for my debt. We see in Jesus what we ought to be – men who endure for God’s will, and who give everything selflessly in His name. That is true human perfection, no matter how the world tells us otherwise. And though it is surely beyond us, our mere intention to be like Christ pleases Him and He will surely help us achieve what He has designed us to be.

(2) I resonate a lot with Peter in both accounts. Jesus was already grooming Peter to be the leader of the Church after His departure from history. Peter, zealous as he is, promises Christ to follow Him to wherever He will be. But Jesus knew this was an empty promise and I feel that He sought to humble Peter by predicting correctly how many times he will end up denying Christ. Many times I feel like Peter, promising so much of myself to Christ but not really living up to those promises. A lot of times, I fail to get the point of discipleship, like when Peter attacks the slave when Jesus’ point for the sword was to prepare for the trials in their mission ahead. A lot of times, I do not cooperate with what He asks of me, like when Jesus asks His disciples to pray that they may not undergo the test, but instead they sleep in grief.

I think that Peter felt forced to deny Jesus in order to survive. Not at any point did Peter actually deny Jesus for who He is, but only that in those three times he denied Jesus, he thought more about himself. He was the character foil to Christ in those accounts, a selfish man who knew what had to be done but didn’t. I already know Jesus, but a lot of times, I am guilty of being too selfish to do what must be done for Him.

But I take great comfort in that, in Luke, despite Peter’s denial, Christ still looked at him. I think, though not explicitly stated, it was the most loving look Christ ever gave Peter. I pray that I always find that loving stare in my life because I know it is what will sustain me to choose the right things for Him.

(3) Finally, I also somehow resonate with Pilate. For all the condemnation Pilate has received throughout history (yes, we condemn him every time we say the creed), we have to give him credit that despite not having heard Jesus before unlike the Pharisees who sought to have him killed, he understood that Jesus had to be treated with a modicum of respect. He knew the truth to a certain extent – that Jesus was an innocent man. It was the only truth that mattered at that time, the truth that could have saved Jesus from damnation. The sin of Pilate, which I think I am guilty a lot of times as well, is that despite having known the truth, he allowed the pressures of the world around him – the Jews, the political situation, the laws and man-made customs – to push him to do what he knew was wrong. A lot of times, I hide behind these empty reasons when I fail to do what is right despite having known it. I pray that I be more courageous in not just being aware of what is true, right and good, but doing what ought to be done for Him.

Have a blessed Good Friday ☺
Today is a time for celebration, because 2000 years ago, Jesus sacrificed Himself for us to restore our friendship with God.

Something to Remember 19

2009-04-09T07:17:00.000-07:00

I just finished reading Jeremiah. I've been wanting to read it for the longest time but it was often difficult for me to finish because of the type of language used and I wasn't as knowledgeable of the entire context of Jewish culture before. I wanted to read it because I knew it had a pretty good story of how a young man is called by God to serve in the most difficult way possible.

Some of the main lessons and themes I got from reading it:
(1) God calls us the day we were conceived (or even before). It was a matter for us to decide when to actually listen to that call.

"The Word of the Lord came to me thus:
'Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you,
before you were born I dedicated you,
a prophet to the nations I appointed you.'"

Often times, when we hear the call, we are afraid, perhaps rightfully so, because we are aware of our weaknesses.

"'Ah Lord God!' I said, 'I know not how to speak; I am too young'"

But when the Lord calls us, He promises to help us be the person we need to be to serve Him.

"But the Lord answered me, 'Say not, "I am too young"
to whomever I send you, you shall go;
whatever I command you, you shall speak,
have no fear before them,
because I am with you to deliver you', says the Lord"
- Jeremiah 1:4-8

It was a difficult vocation to be a prophet during Jeremiah's time. Israel and Judah were undergoing radical changes mainly because the nation was subscribing to the cultures and with it, the religion, of the world powers surrounding it. To speak for God was to fight the powers-that-be and to persuade a stubborn society to change itself to escape a doom that was its own doing.

And yet Jeremiah answered, proclaiming the prophesy of Israel's doom, her sins against God and prescribing a way to salvation. It was confusing to read the book at first because it seemed like the lamentations against Israel were being said multiple times in that 44 chapter book. But I realized after, this was a prophet that lasted three reigns of the kings of Israel, from Josiah to the last one during the Babylonian occupation. He never tired of doing God's will and though it was with great hurt that he was speaking of the doom of Israel, he did so courageously, even in the face of persecution and death.

(2) It was also difficult for me at the beginning to reconcile how the God of love of the New Testament, who sent His only Son to finally bring us all back to Him, could be so vengeful, so angry and so unforgiving. Imagine having children and feeding them to the lions. God was telling His chosen people, because you have forsaken Me, I will let Assyria and Babylon lay waste to you. And then after it had come to pass, He tells them I will help you rebuild your lives. And when they rebel again, siding with the Egyptians when God explicitly tells them to serve the Babylonians, He allows the destruction of their nation. It was an interesting thing to see God exacting justice we humans can easily understand.

But I think the book was sharing a different point on God's justice. Certainly, God was not happy that His people was turning His back on Him. But the point wasn't God punishing those who choose to denounce His love, but that He was a stern Father teaching His children humility. The mere fact of God conversing with His people through Jeremiah is sign enough of His love for Him. Of course, given the understanding of God at that time, we see a vengeful and spiteful God reminiscent of the gods of Greek mythology. But I think beyond the cultural differences, the main message of Jeremiah is that God was concerned for His people and that He allows justice to be dealt upon them to teach them humility.

The Israelites were a stubborn and proud people. If you read the entire Old Testament, you'll probably see a pattern of God getting angry and then Him getting angry at the oppressors of His people, the same ones He unleashed upon them. But what is more fruitful to look at was the cycle of Israel's attitude with God. At times, they were a faithful people, but when they reached the zenith of prosperity, they forget their roots, turn to the ways of their affluent neighbors (which inevitably includes religious practices) and in a way, forget the God that brought them that prosperity in the first place. I can imagine that by taking away that comfortable life, God reminds His people that it was He that brought them out of slavery from Egypt, and that it was in Him only can they live prosperous and peaceful lives. God is faithful, that is why He does not allow His people to fall so far away from Him.

We should look to ourselves and consider if we are growing too proud of ourselves that we forget the Source of everything that is.

(3) A final thought that is liberating. For all the freedom we've been granted, we achieve our ultimate potential not in a world we create for ourselves but, paradoxically, by surrendering ourselves to the will of God.

"You know, O Lord that man is not master of his way. Man's course is not within his choice, nor is for him to direct his step."
- Jeremiah 10:23

Have a blessed Maundy Thursday. :)
Today is special in the life of the Church because 2000 years ago, Jesus instituted the Sacraments of the Eucharist and the Holy Orders. How did He actually do it? It was simple really: He washed the feet of His disciples and shared a meal with them.
Truly, God is the God of both the simple and the grand. :)

Step-up :)

2009-04-08T20:55:00.000-07:00

(Warning: A very long post. I’m writing it chronologically so realizations may pop up in the middle of the paragraphs.)

This entry is an attempt to capture what I experienced in the 16th CFC- YFC International Leaders’ Conference in Cebu City from April 3-6, 2009. I say attempt because the richness of experience you get from these events of such scale (9000 delegates from different parts of the world, 44 from Ateneo and a lot of other familiar faces in a region ___ kilometers away from home) can never really be expressed satisfactorily in words. It is both faith enriching and community building and so the only reservoir fitting for the experience would be the heart. The task to articulate the experience was so daunting that last year, I utterly failed. But the impetus to do it was so strong that I started this blog on the premise of recording these very memorable annual events and sharing God’s messages to the world.

I begin this sharing by talking about what ILC has always meant to me. The first ILC I went to, the 14th in Naga City, solidified God’s call for me to be part of YFC. The second ILC I went to, the 15th in Tagaytay City, affirmed God’s promise of helping me in the long and arduous task of actually growing up. The ILC has become a bookmark in my spiritual journey that began since birth but I recognized the way I do now in 3rd year high school. My ILC experience is a continuing story, a saga of my life that has yet to end. At the same time, it’s also a kind of retreat as you leave everything to go to an unfamiliar place with people whether friends or strangers, reminiscent of Jesus’ frequent travels to the top of the mountains and hills or middle of the deserts and seas usually to find Himself and God before He engages in His ministry. It’s a different kind because you are rarely silent but called to always be prayerful. Usually for me, God’s call is clearest in these events where you can step back and look at the entirety of the picture. It’s so easy to have a conversation with God when you have nothing to think about but just the small things: food, lodging and where to sit to get the best view. It’s a spiritual pilgrimage, but a truly exciting one in the modern sense of the term – with everything that will engage all your senses.

This year’s ILC, in retrospect, was in a way one of God’s responses for my request to “grow up”. Unlike Naga and Tagaytay, I would have to travel by plane to a place that would not be easily accessible by my parents. But I didn’t have as much difficulty asking permission to attend the event as I did in Naga. I guess and I hope they see how YFC is transforming my life and it is a subtle affirmation that I continue to live out my faith the way I do. The more difficult task was to actually acquire the resources for the trip. I will be frank about the expenses – Php 8,000.00 for just the basics (transpo, lodging, registration). I probably spent about Php 10,000.00. Again in retrospect, perhaps it was God’s challenge for me to actually be a grown-up, to use what talents and resources I have to get what I want and what He wants for me. I set-up a small loading business and with a lot of saving up, I managed to cover 80% of my expenses. Truly, a lot of growing up was needed to keep yourself from eating that extra cake or buying that book or spending an extra hour playing in a computer shop. But by God’s grace of discipline and direction, I was able to achieve it. As you may have noticed, the logistics and finances, no matter how secular they may seem, can easily and clearly be rooted in the faith we all strive to live out and it makes so much more sense if there is that steady direction to the things that we do.

I was bringing plenty of “experiential baggage” that I hoped God would make sense of in the ILC. I guess in responding to my yearning for opportunities to grow up, God just unleashed a multitude of new experiences in my life, breaking me where I needed to be broken and fashioning a different me, transforming my life to the point of non-recognition. But it was a process between just me and God. He wasn’t giving me liposuction or a facelift. For a whole year, I was undergoing internal pruning from both internal and external sources. I experienced a lot of deaths, got into a dorm and experienced a slightly higher modicum of freedom, met a lot of new people, and became intimate with a lot more – each and every experience building up to another. Second year was marked by a lot of crossroads and intersections, and I had to give up a lot of things and stand up for a lot of decisions I had to make. It was a confusing time for me. I was broken in to a million pieces, but God was steadily molding me into a new and better person, more open to His promptings and more ready than ever to respond to what He wants for me. It’s not over, but I have recognized this much. The ending highlight of the year perhaps is my exploration of two of three possible paths to my life-long vocation – priesthood and marriage. I was bringing that question to the ILC and I was hoping He would give me an answer there as well. So I traveled with that question in mind, hoping to find clues to what God wants for my life but expecting to be surprised again.

The travel to Cebu was pretty interesting. It was my first domestic flight, and it was comfortable. Though some of our other delegates got better deals with PAL, I was just glad to be on that plane on the way to Cebu. I’ve been on a plane once in my life before, on the way to Hong Kong, but I could barely remember the experience. It was just like riding a roller coaster, and yet you can see the world fall below you. We were flying at around 30,000 feet and I can only marvel at the beauty of God’s creation. I’ve always been a fan of clouds, so I found it awesome to see them from the top. As we were descending, I was thinking of how small we actually are in the bigger cosmic schemes. It has always been said but I was seeing it first hand, we were literally specks in the grandeur of the world and yet we seem to have the uncanny ability to build our own worlds and forget how we are but a mere part of it. As we arrived, and went down the plane, I realized why we are able to do it – our ingenuity and creativity seems so limitless that we can build planes to conquer the skies. One of God’s most enduring gifts to us is our intellect and we have used it to extend ourselves to master the world. The question that popped was are we using that gift well?

We landed on Mactan so there was the matter of traveling to Cebu. We were expecting to get cabs but fortunately, the organizers rented a bus for a free ride to the staging area, Sacred Heart School. Throughout the trip, I was on the look out as to how different Cebu was from Manila. For one thing, there was a lot less traffic and a whole lot less noise. It was a Thursday and for someone so used to the hustle and bustle of Cubao, North Avenue and Recto, Mactan and downtown Cebu was like Binondo during Pacquiao matches. So for all the touting of Cebu being the “Queen City of the South”, it was still a far cry from “Imperialistic Manila”. But the thing that caught my attention was it seems there weren’t a lot of shanties – they probably had them relocated before the last ASEAN summit in Cebu. It wasn’t able to hide however that poverty was very much present in Cebu as well. I have one photo in my album and I was thinking, “May taong grasa din pala sa Cebu, parang Katipunan lang e.”

After we dropped our bags at the Center for Education, Development and Training (CENDET) of the United Churches of Christ in the Philippines (UCCP) along Osmena Boulevard, we went on to some of the historical sites of Cebu. We rode jeeps (or multicabs as they seem to call it there) that bore the amazing route numbers. I’d like to think they were a product of more progressive planning – something Manila sorely lacks. We passed by downtown Cebu and it was really just like Binondo only smaller. As we reached Magellan’s Cross, the first thing that caught my attention was how small the Cross actually was (hehe). The next was that City Hall was directly in front of it which affirms that Cebu was really built by the Spaniards following the “pueblo” model of city planning – putting all the government and religious buildings at the center. The final thing that moved me was that there were candle vendors much like in Antipolo, but they actually wore costumes, with IDs. They were middle aged to senior women asking us to buy candles and dance something as a sign of tribute to the cross. Moving on to the other side of the Basilica, there were also old women selling candles, only they probably weren’t registered so they wore their normal clothes and sold candles on the street. Who would possibly buy in such an inconspicuous area? I was filled with a strange feeling. I was worried for them, asking myself how they could keep surviving that kind of life and that they seem to be the neglected part of society. The interesting thing was inside the Basilica, there was actually a candle lighting area and they actually had candles there (they are theoretically free but you are invited to donate for their use). Basic economics: why would I buy candles from ambulant vendors when there was a solid institution that could satisfy my needs. This was a lot different from Antipolo because you knew people would actually be buying candles from these vendors. It was a puzzling experience to think about how these old women, nearing the end of their lives, with their backs bent and possibly hurting, could still continue such as livelihood that promises so little in return. Are these not the kind of people that should be taken care of already by the government or the Church? I could only speculate how they manage to survive but I know they do as we all do, by God’s grace.

We explored the Basilica of Sto. Nino de Cebu and it was again smaller than I expected, although they had this huge plaza where I presume they would have their open air masses. It was a lot smaller church than the seats of archdioceses in Manila (I’ve been to two: Kalookan and Manila Cathedrals) and yet like in Antipolo, there were a lot of people lining up to touch the Sto. Nino. It was as much a tourist destination as it was a place of worship. I found nothing wrong with it except its still beyond my faith to have this intense devotion on images of reverence, such as the Sto. Nino, presumably the first gift of the Spaniards to the people of Cebu.

We moved on to Fort San Pedro and it was a smaller version of Fort Santiago. It was a triangular fort with cannons but they transformed the inner grounds into something similar to a garden you could use for receptions. This place was memorable not for its historicity (although I do enjoy it), but because this was my first opportunity to do something about that strange feeling I had at the Basilica. I realized God was turning my attention to these things for a reason and I realized perhaps it was Him telling me to give what I can to people I meet, probably for the last time. I had nothing to give but the warmth of a conversation and actually remembering who they were. I’ve heard this once before, that asking a person’s name gives a face to an otherwise faceless person who was simply to us a vendor, or a driver, or a stranger in the crowd. So it was in this place that I met Mang Adonis, a vendor at the souvenir shop. He’s been selling these things for years already but he seems to be happy about his life. He had this ingenious way of writing stuff on the souvenir items – a syringe with paint. That’s what he used to write on the decorative souvenir we bought as a token for the Villa family who later fed us. We said goodbye to Fort San Pedro and went on to the Villa residence along Mabini Street. Their house was pretty big and you’d see how they can afford to send Nile to the Ateneo. They hosted a dinner for all 44 of us and it was great. The taxi driver who brought us to Mabini (I forgot his name ☹) was talking to us about life in Cebu, how it was cheaper to get food here and yet every bit more sumptuous than food in Manila. He used to drive in Manila but transferred back in Cebu. Gasoline was a lot more expensive in Cebu because of freight costs (Php 36.00 per liter compared to our Php 23.00) but food was really cheap. He talked to us about pusu, rice wrapped around leaves and cooked that way and how cheap but tasty it was. It was the same pusu that we ate at the Villa residence together with lechon that didn’t have sarsa but didn’t need to have to because it was so filled with flavor already. For desert, we had mangoes, some of the sweetest I’ve ever tasted. ☺ The house wasn’t much different from the ones you’ll probably see in La Vista or Xavierville. Nile’s Lola was actually even watching “May Bukas Pa”, the same show my mom was probably watching the same time. It kind of reinforces how similar life in Cebu and Manila were and how technology can help bridge the cultural gaps these two places may have by uniting them into a singular Filipino culture continually built, transformed and perpetuated by mass media. It was also the first time we saw our beloved graduates who came from an earlier island hopping trip between Cebu and Bohol.

(I hope you’re still with me, this is really a long post)

So our day two begins with some GDs, processing etc. I was chosen to be a team leader again this year, but it wasn’t such a new experience for me because I got to do it last year. What I am glad about day two was that I got to meet more new people – Roi, Jolo, Mara, Teddy, Lalaine and Topher. I made it a point to really remove my “mahiyain” self and make them feel more welcome in our community that was known really for cliquishness (hehe). Hence, I teased Roi and Mara which a lot of people enjoyed and because Teddy was part of my team, I tried to make sure he was comfortable and not bored. It was a tiring thing to be thinking about others, especially a whole team of people, but it made sense later on.

We went to Ayala Center-Cebu and discovered how similar it was to the Ayala Malls in Manila. We ate at Giligan’s because we were looking for seafood because we were abstaining but the highlight of the trip was Dessert Factory. Think Banapple + Five Cows. Their cakes were amazing especially Achocolypse! and that amazing Carrot Cake. Thank you Mara and Nile for bringing us there! An interesting thing happened as we were heading back to the ILC proper. I was wearing my Ateneo jacket and suddenly a group of YFC guys came up to me and started talking to me. They were telling me that they were the only Ateneo team to join the Bayani Challenge in Cebu a week before ILC. We were talking about Xavier University and said what I knew about it, from Fr. Jett to Chuckie. We ended the conversation as we were about to leave by getting their names but I only remembered Chito. It was a funny thing because I wore the Ateneo Jacket to attract some kind of attention and that hopefully another delegation will come up to us and talk to us. It actually worked! hahaha

So we went on to our real first day for ILC which started with the praise parade, a colorful march of different regions showcasing the richness of their culture. This was followed by a mass which had a terrible choir (!!!) but I guess the main highlight, as it has always been, was communion time. It was reminiscent of the feeding of the five thousand and this time, it was nine thousand! It was such a sight to see, a sea of humanity lining up to receive the Bread of Life and sharing a common purpose and common understanding for why they were there and what was about to happen. After the mass was the opening worship and it was simply amazing. This was markedly different from the kinds of worship we have in Ateneo in recent times, because it was a pure praising of God, no inputs, no realizations, just a lifting up of praise to Him with all the energy we could muster. It was prayer as it is supposed to be – an attempt of His creatures to give glory to Him.

I missed the first session because I had to do something for Kimui but I knew it was an affirmation that God was going to speak to me not just through the sessions but the entire experience of being in Cebu. So I did try to help my friend as much as I could and traveled back for what was left of the session. It was talking about basically the different sectors of YFC, how much we’ve accomplished so that we could look more clearly into our future as a community. I guess it was empowering for a lot of people, but I was still disconnected from the theme.

The second day was for workshops and the main sessions of the ILC. It was the morning worship that I liked best of all the worships because it was simple but I knew I was really speaking to my God at that point. We were basking in the heat of the sun but it didn’t matter to us because we were also basking in God’s prescence.

We had to cut up the delegation to three for the three available workshops. I would have wanted to go to the vocation discernment workshop but I knew I had to give up my slot for the graduates who probably needed it more so I went with the rest of the boys to the exhortation workshop. It was an amazing workshop because it quantified for us one of the most important components of worship leading. Exhortation is about preparing the entire community to worship God. It was amazing not only for the input but also for the opportunity to try it out. I guess this was God preparing me for the other thing He has asked me to do soon. We also met here some friends from Negros especially Jayson who was part of our group. He just graduated this March and was going to take a test to get into Ateneo but opted to go to ILC instead. To a lot of people, it was probably a stupid decision, but seeing him share it to us with much conviction, I could understand how important YFC and this event was to him so I respect him for that certainty of where his heart is.

We went back to the venue for the sessions. It wasn’t very memorable except the message Forget and Focus which many of us felt should have to be characterized further. For me, you can’t really forget anything because that’s how you actually learn – through memory. It’s more of dissecting an experience, removing the negative things that can prove so cumbersome to move on and focus on the positive things that could help you move forward better prepared for the next challenges. It seemed to me a big sharing of what full-time work was about, or what stepping up in YFC is but I just couldn’t connect anymore because my stepping-up time for the moment had passed and the bigger question of vocation wasn’t being answered by the input given. What I did appreciate about day two was the final worship wherein the adoration of the Blessed Sacrament was put at the core of the worship. It was an amazing thing to not just put it as a separate event or an exclamation point to everything but to put it at the very heart of what we see as our identity as YFC. It was answered prayer for my part and a lot of others I’ve shared this too. I wasn’t sure everyone was prepared for it because I noticed some people didn’t understand what was happening, but for me, the mere actualized intention of returning to the core of our faith is a good sign that I’m still in the right community. ☺

In the second day mass, I asked a brother from Bulacan, Jasper, to sit with us because they simply didn’t have enough seats. We talked a little after mass talking to me about how big their delegation were, where they stayed and how he was liking it so far. It was unfortunate that they had to move because of the bounty parade. But it was an interesting surprise for him to text me the morning after we went back to Manila to thank me for the kindness. It was such an amazing thing for a stranger you opened up to for just a while to go out of his way and tell you he say God in you in that small act of kindness. Galing talaga!

As we were going home, I met Mang Nelson Pareja who used to be a jeepney driver in Manila taking the route of Navotas-Divisoria. He was there a long time ago because he was sharing to me landmarks that had long been replaced. But it was an interesting experience to have someone a thousand kilometers away know about my hometown.

Everything only made sense in the third day. I can’t recall exactly how I got to it but I think for all the stepping up the sessions were talking about, God was directing me to a different place. The past year, I’ve been immersed in questions of things larger than my life – vocation, or even the big decisions of which leadership position to assume. I heard God telling me to look into the smaller details of my life and to step up in them – He called me to be a “kuya” somehow to my group because He was preparing me to be a better “kuya” if I’m given a household or simply to people who look up to me and my own brothers at home. He was calling me to be a better student, as I now realize I’ve neglected so much. He was calling me to step up more in the leadership position I had assumed, to bear the cross I’ve chosen with much vigor. He was calling me to step up in the friendships I had especially with the graduates who would no longer be as present physically. He was calling me to step up as a son, to relearn humility in obedience and love. These were “smaller” things, but daunting at the same time. This was God’s call for me for the year, and as always, He gave me the promise of company in the journey He was calling me to take. God speaks to me through opportunities and it’s a funny thing that right after ILC, He’s been giving it to me.

Before the final worship, we went to speak with the La Salle delegation. There was a time our two schools were a lot closer that we shared a camp once four years ago. So we talked for a while, and we’re expecting Miguel to join us next year. He’s incoming LM.

The final worship was truly an empowering one. To be praising God in the heat of the sun was one thing, but to do it with the community you’ve grown with and you’ll grow it is another. To pray over each other and to ask God to bless each one was for me the most empowering thing YFC has always given to me. When you pray for each other, it wasn’t simply calling God’s grace to fall into that person, it was a promise of you becoming that grace to him. It’s the sacramental principle: grace builds on nature. God’s grace is not some magical aura that enters you, it’s concretized in things of this world, and for that special moment, I knew we were to each other God’s grace. There was a rare meteorological occurrence during the worship – a rainbow appeared on top of us, horizontal so it means the cirrus clouds above us were actually precipitating but it wasn’t reaching us. That way, there was a prism being formed above us and it looked like a circle was covering us.

ILC might be over but our trip to Cebu wasn’t. We headed to Portofino Beach Resort and along the way we met Mang Florie, a taxi driver. He also used to drive a taxi in Manila but he found his wife in Cebu so they decided to settle here. It was interesting how you can make such big decisions for the people you love – leaving your previous life in Manila just to start a new one with your one true love. And I wondered if I could do the same or if God actually cut me out to experience it.

I had to sleep for a while because I was terribly exhausted and Ed was also sick. But when I woke up and went to the beach I was in for a surprise. Our delegation was in a competition with La Salle – Dasma building sand castles and we won (hehe). So the La Salle delegation danced the YFC Step-up chant. Later on, while we were gearing up to join them, you could here them singing and having fun along the beach as far off as our cottage. It was such fun to find other YFCs who were practical strangers but had been through the same experience you went through as well. Solidarity the way Christ envisioned it ☺ Another surprise was that UST was also there and the three got together and decided we should worship together in the middle of the beach. So amidst the many onlookers there at the beach, we formed a circle and just worshipped God. Extra amazing was Roi who stepped up and led us into worship. ☺ Amazing lang talaga.

We also went to Su Tu Kil for dinner and it was amazing to see the market so clean. Talked with Ate Sally there who was sharing that they had a shellfish business and the empty shells they collect to make souvenir items. Sustainable business framework, walang waste in fairness ☺

We left the beach, stayed for a while at SM Cebu where we bought plenty of pasalubong, went back to Mactan Airport and finally home.

Haaaay. Haba haha. I’m bringing home a lot of things from Cebu but I think the most powerful is that I still have a family in YFC no matter what – one of the clearest signs of God’s faithfulness in my life. ☺ I’m excited for the year ahead and where God will lead all of us next ☺ Next ILC sa Baguio wahoo!

WANTED: Freedom

2009-03-03T08:53:00.000-08:00

I don't know when it started, but I feel I'm a prisoner. I am chained to my responsibilities, put behind the bars of expectations. My being yearns to be something it is hindered from becoming. And I feel my search now is not so much a love that makes me happy, or makes me complete, or understands me - but a love that liberates.

This is the theme of my life right now: The search for liberation, to be known for nothing else but by who you are, to be loved so effortlessly, so completely.

I know where to find it. I'm just waiting to be released. Or then again, maybe I'm my own jail warden.

Note to Self :)

2008-12-05T16:08:00.000-08:00

You can never get tired of love, because if you truly, deeply, fully love people, there is no doubt that they will share it back, though that love will surely be transformed into something more beautiful. Love seems to be an infinite commodity. And you always have to place your heart where it receives the most love. Stretch the heart, because love will make it full anyway. :)

Yesterday was truly, deeply, fully a revelatory event for me. I understand now the oft-used phrase: "I love because God has loved me first." Because how could so much love exist in the world if it did not come from an infinite source? Love is our first experience of our final destiny with God. Yesterday, I was overwhelmed with that experience, in the most positively profound way possible. Salamat Panginoon, pinaalala mo sa akin na it's all worth it. :D

Back to Basics

2008-07-29T05:51:00.000-07:00

The past two months have been incredibly heavy, painful and difficult for me, like one looooooong long test and you can't find the answers. Or perhaps, you know the answers but you just can't write them down in the proper form to get full points. I've began to doubt myself again and when I do that, I feel guilty because I seem to doubt what God has in store for my life.

One realization I've managed to get from the confounding combination of moderately difficult problems that I am facing right now is that I have a lot of growing up to do. But when you think about it, do you really just say I want to grow up and it happens? Because if it does, it's not working for me.

I feel that this painful tunnel in my life will be longer than I would hope but, cliche as it may seem, there is always light at the end of the tunnel. Because if there isn't, what a sad journey it would be.

Then again, only in the darkest night when the moon is veiled and the clouds are gone do we see the beauty of the millions and millions of the jewels of the universe. It just keeps growing darker for me these days and the best thing to do perhaps is gaze at the stars.

"You will suffer the world. But take courage! I have overcome the world." - John 16:33

Something to remember 18

2008-01-12T16:39:00.000-08:00

"Then Jesus came from Galilee to John at the Jordan to be baptized by him. John tried to prevent him, saying, "I need to be baptized by you, and yet you are coming to me?" Jesus said to him in reply, "Allow it now, for thus it is fitting for us to fulfill all righteousness." Then he allowed him. After Jesus was baptized, he came up from the water and behold, the ehavens were opened (for him), and he saw the Spirit of God descending like a dove (and) coming upon him. And a voice came from the heavens, saying, "This is my beloved Son, with whom I am well pleased." - Matthew 3: 13-17

People often ask why God chooses to not just change the world in just one flick of a finger. Why not eradicate poverty, hunger, sickness, death, evil, sin Himself? The question is not that He cannot do it, only why not? And I will not even try to guess at the grand plan of God but what is clear to me is that He calls us to be part of His work to do just this. We are that important to Him.

In the Baptism of Jesus, John makes a valid point: why should I baptize you when you should be the one baptizing me? It tells volumes of how much God wants us to be involved in His plan when at a glance, He can do a much better job alone.

The Baptism of Jesus is a testament to what can happen if we allow God to use us in His plan. Indeed, as we have seen here, He used John and He can always use us to glorify Him even more, to reveal Himself more fully to the world.

Something to Remember 17

2008-01-10T03:51:00.000-08:00

Beautiful words of encouragement in these dark days of pessimism, doubt and despair, when it is so much easier to forsake the right for the convenient and the pleasurable.

"For the love of God is this, that we keep his commandments. And his commandments are not burdensome, for whoever is begotten by God conquers the world. And the victory that conquers the world is our faith. Who [indeed] is the victor over the world but the one who believes that Jesus is the Son of God?"
- 1 John 5: 3-5

Finding meaning in Christmas

2007-12-25T15:05:00.000-08:00

It was only this year that more than half of the Christmas messages I got reminded all of us of the reason behind the season (cool talaga ng phrase na toh haha). I felt happy that despite the intense consumerism that seems to possess people during this season (myself included), we did not forget why we were exchanging gifts or giving (for my part, receiving) aguinaldo.

I had a lot of fun yesterday because it was a different Christmas. We had Lucky Me pancit canton for Noche Buena because floods (patalong global warming + gravitational pull of the moon) kept us from going to our grandparents' place for the traditional Christmas dinner. It was fun to be spending a lot more time with the immediate family but sad at the same time because my 80+ years old grandparents were all alone (I'm not sure if they minded, but these events are the few ones when our entire family is present). I got a lot of aguinaldo and reached the target I set this year (yes, I combine the Christmas "bonus" and my savings the whole year). Everything else that happened was just great.

However, all that joy got me thinking: is this really how we remember the birth of our Lord? We count our money, open our presents, eat a lot of food. Is it really just a celebration? It felt to me lacking. It is good to celebrate just as the shepherds and the wise men did when they reached the manger where the Savior was born.

I guess it is easy enough to find the meaning of Christmas on the day itself. I feel that the challenge is to find its meaning on the days that come after because Jesus the baby did not come to the earth one night and left the next. He stayed with us, growing and getting ready for His ministry. I feel we should do the same. We've allowed Christ to enter our hearts yesterday once more. Our task now is to keep Him alive in us until we are called to Him at the end of our days. That I feel, is the true meaning of Christmas.

The True Spirit of Christmas

2007-12-23T14:30:00.000-08:00

I got this from today's editorial at the Inquirer:

"The vigorous Catholicism of writers like G. K. Chesterton and our own Horacio de la Costa [yes, yung may statue pa hehe] taught many to see (and to welcome) the upside-down quality in the Christian faith: It is a religion of reversal, where the last shall be first and the poor inherit the earth. And where the object of pilgrimage becomes a pilgrim himself, a fellow transient. He is one of us; He is God-with-us."

It is my hope that as we celebrate tonight and tomorrow, we may never forget why we are celebrating at all - that 2 millenia ago, the object of our journey in life came to us that He may be one of us, God-with-us, that He might deliver His ultimate gift: our salvation.

Merry Christmas everyone!

Something to remember 16

2007-12-23T05:11:00.001-08:00

"because of the tender mercy of our God by which the daybreak from on high will visit us to shine on those who sit in darkness and death's shadow, to guide our feet into the path of peace."
- Luke 1:78-79

This is a very wonderful prophesy by Zechariah, who, once upon a time, was made mute when he refused to believe in the power of God. It comes from a man who saw God's hand working in his life first hand. And now, by the prompting of the Holy Spirit, he proclaims God's hand at work for all mankind.

The generosity of God cannot be undone and truly He gives the best gifts we could ever receive. Tomorrow, we are reminded of the most wonderful gift He gave mankind past, present and future - the daybreak that will shine on those who sit in darkness: Jesus Christ.

Fighting with Hope

2007-12-22T18:46:00.001-08:00

Keeping up with my yearly tradition, I am currently having another Lord of the Rings marathon. To enrich the experience, I decided to use the extended versions (a total of 12 hours for the three movies) as material for this year's marathon hehe.

The Lord of the Rings is such an appealing literary work because like most classics, its message remains relevant today. I think the whole point of all the battles, quests and victories that span 12 hours of the movies and three novels is summarized in this short anecdote delivered by Sam near the end of the second movie:

Sam: "It's like in the great stories Mr. Frodo; the ones that really mattered. Full of darkness and danger they were and sometimes you didn't want to know the end because how can the end be happy, how can the world go back to the way it was, when so much bad had happened. But in the end, it's only a passing thing, this shadow, even darkness must pass; a new day will come and when the sun shines, it will shine out the clearer. Those were the stories that stayed with you, that meant something even if you were too small to understand why. I think Mr. Frodo I do understand. I know now folk in those stories had lots of chances to turn back only they didn't. They kept going because they were holding on to something..."

Frodo:
"What are we holding on to Sam?"

Sam: "That there is some good in this world, Mr. Frodo, and it's worth fighting for..."

Everyone in the fellowship had their own roles to play but I think the most beautiful one is that of Sam. Even if he perhaps killed the least number of orcs, his role was vital to the quest. He kept hope alive in the moments when darkness seemed to be the only thing they were getting themselves into.

And today, that message of hope remains. Though our battles are not against orcs or balrogs or the monsters of old, we are at war with the Saurons within us, keeping us from living the life we ought to live - a life of love, holiness and righteousness. We are at war with the Mordor of this world, covering society in the darkness of injustice and oppression. These are the wars we must fight even in the face of insurmountable obstacles. And in the end, we know the darkness will pass because we are holding on to the Source of Light and Goodness Himself.

Hope is one of the best gifts God gives us especially this Christmas season because it lends us the strength to keep on fighting for God.

Something to remember 15

2007-12-20T03:19:00.000-08:00

3 days before Christmas - that pivotal moment in history that revealed to us that we have a God that has not forsaken us to sin and that He is a God of promises that are fulfilled.

We are called to be witnesses to His promise - for the people of Israel before, the first coming of the Emmanuel; for us today, the second coming of the Messiah.

What does it mean to be a witness to God's promises?
We must strive to follow the example of John the Baptist, the greatest of those born of women, and Mary, pure from the moment of conception.

Like John, let us acknowledge and rejoice in the presence of our God wherever we may be (for John, even in the womb of his mother).
Like Mary, let us say yes to God in every possible way (for Mary, her sweet yes that turned her from virgin daugther to virgin mother of God).
Like John, let us prepare the way for His coming by taking part in building His kingdom on earth (for John, it was by baptizing the people and living a holy life).
Like Mary, let us recognize God's hand in our lives and reflect on the gradual fulfillment of His promises in our hearts.
Like Mary and John, let us always remain hopeful of the fulfillment of God's promises in our lives.
Like Mary and John, let us be willing to go the distance to be faithful to God's promises even if it means suffering (for Mary, the suffering of a mother seeing her own Son hurt and killed) and death (for John, by beheading).

There is a wonderful song about a man who was witness to the promises of God and was filled with joy and final fulfillment upon seeing it before his eyes. It was Simeon, when Jesus was presented in the temple and the title of the song is Simeon's Canticle (music by Manoling Francisco, S.J.) based on Luke 2:29-32. It's part of the Hangad Christmas album I bought yesterday. I long for the day that his words may be mine as well:

Lord, let your servant go in peace
For Your Word has been fulfilled

My own eyes have seen Your salvation
Which You have prepared for all men

Lord, let your servant go in peace

Truly the best Christmas carols are the ones that proclaim the true spirit of Christmas - that of love overflowing from the coming of the source of love Himself into the world.

Tuned In

2007-12-16T06:32:00.000-08:00

My first youth camp as a facilitator was more than I had wanted it to be.

Before the camp, I had only wanted a break from the monotony of my current life. I wanted to experience again the high of thinking of nothing else but serving God because our routines often distract us from that vision.

True to the name of the camp, God allowed me to tune in to Him once more. The first semester was a time of confusion for me. I felt there was something missing in my relationship with God and I was confused and frustrated and insecure. But during the camp, He reminded me that I should not bother myself too much with the details of life because I need only depend on Him completely and everything will turn out His way - the best way. The experience of serving Him just showed me His overwhelming and overflowing love.

After the camp, He kept me tuned in. He opened my consciousness to His surprises and now I see Him working in my life more clearly than ever before.

My birthday this year was just extra special because of His surprises. My second semester may still be filled with frustration but now I am better equipped to handle them.

God always has a way of surprising us. We need only tune in to Him and every moment of our lives will be a surprise from Him.

Something to remember 14

2007-12-16T05:44:00.000-08:00

"but he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for power is made perfect in weakness.' I will rather boast most gladly of my weaknesses, in order that the power of Christ may dwell with me."
- 2 Corinthians 12:9

Rejoice in our weaknesses and imperfections because it is through these that we can easily see how God works in our lives. We should be grateful when we are at the highest points of our lives but we must be even grateful in the lowest points, in our frustrations and unfulfilled desires because it is in these moments that we depend on God more completely. Everything has a reason and the comforts of our lives are easy enough to rationalize. We need to ask for the grace to see God even in our weaknesses, insecurities and frustrations.

Something to remember 13

2007-12-08T17:21:00.000-08:00

Commitment is difficult and seemingly impossible in this age.

Is it possible to commit yourself to something without knowing the entirety of what you need to do and what you will face in doing it?

Is it possible to commit your entire life to the Lord and His mission for you?

Yes. Mary, the Mother of God, did just that with this single statement:

"Behold I am the handmaid of the Lord. May it be done to me according to your word."
- Luke 1:38

How?

Not by her own power, but only through the grace of God.

"for nothing will be impossible with God." - Luke 1:37

We need only say yes, and God will do the rest.

Distrust

2007-11-24T07:23:00.000-08:00

It's always such a fruitful experience to meet people like Sir Vlad who seem to draw out insights you wouldn't think about on your own.

My meeting him and talking to him about my current adventures in Ateneo made me realize how rich a source of insight my Sanggu experience is in understanding how the government works in the Philippines.

The cool thing about the Sanggunian and its place in the Ateneo community is very much like that of the Philippine government in the country. The structure of the Sanggunian is very much the same as in the real government, only the positions have different names. The Sanggunian, like the national government, functions because of the taxes of the people (in our case, the student activities fund paid as part of the tuition). There so many more parallelisms but they are not the focus of this entry.

What I want to focus on is how do you make a government work effectively and efficiently? Is corruption really the major problem faced internally by the current administration? From my experience in the Sanggunian, I don't think so. The Sanggunian officers, at the very least, are not corrupt (yes, Gadfly will agree as well), precisely because we have a very tight auditing office and the system will simply not allow it. Are the Sanggunian officers incompetent? I don't think so either because most of us are very active and successful in other places like student organizations, outside organizations, non-government organizations and other types of groups. Is it a problem of structure? Maybe but to me I think there is a deeper problem.

I guess my experience in the Sanggunian tells me that corruption is not the only problem and perhaps not even the biggest. I feel that the problem is what corruption breeds - distrust. It is when the people lose confidence in their leaders that authority is crippled. No matter how great a leader is in so many aspects, the people will not see it because of the cataract of distrust placed there by corruption. I feel it is a problem not only of the leaders but of the people as well. It practically cuts off the ties of between leader and people.

I have no idea where the distrust (or perhaps indifference is a better term) toward the Sanggunian comes from. I came into the institution without knowing that this was the situation. But what I do know is that it is a problem that has to be mutually solved by the officers and their consituents. No matter how hard the officers work, if the people refuse to see that, then nothing will come out of it. The people have the responsibility to be vigilant of those they elected because no one else will. If they remain distrustful to the point of indifference, then nothing good will happen for the entire community. I would rather see angry and revolting constituents - at least they know something's wrong and they want to do something about it.

In the context of the national government, this is, I believe, is more applicable. Despite the strength of the macro-economic indicators, the infrastructure projects and other achievements of this administration, a single wrongdoing not even of the highest official erases all of these in the eyes of the people. The greatest weapon against an institution is distrust. This is why terrorism and corruption are powerful. They make people lose trust in the institutions that are supposed to combat both. Although technically the government has not lost the war on terrorism or corruption, both are gradually winning the hearts and minds of people. Both are cultivating the destructive seeds of fear and distrust. Not agreeing to the leaders of the government is one thing. Distrusting the capacity of government to serve the people is another.

The signs of how distrustful the people have become are very obvious. The Human Security Act, the Cybereducation project, the JPEPA. All these are lightning rod issues that are not difficult to resolve if the people trust the government (and if the government is deserving of the trust i.e. they are doing the right thing).

If the government wants genuine progress in our nation, it has to realize that trust is an integral part of it and that it must take concrete steps to win back the trust of the people. I know the Sanggunian is doing just that.

Something to remember 12

2007-11-24T07:21:00.000-08:00

The cross is one of the most important icons of our faith because it represents the kingship of Jesus on earth. He has two thrones: one on the right hand of the Father, another on the cross.

It is on the cross that He conquered the world - not by force as we humans are so prone to do but by eternal and unconditional love. It is on the cross that He carried the weight of sins past, present and future and claimed a kingdom for Himself in the most unlikely way. He freed us from the bondage of sin on the cross, that we may no longer be slaves to sin and become citizens in the Kingdom of God.

This is why the sign of the cross is important at the beginning and end of the prayer. It is not merely a convenient way of opening and closing a prayer. It is a declaration of the kingship of Jesus in our lives. Nothing can be more beautiful than that.

The Root of Apathy

2007-10-10T01:41:00.000-07:00

Apathy is defined as the state of indifference - without enthusiasm, emotion or motivation. Apathy is such a buzz word especially in the realm of politics and society, whether it is on the school or even the national level. Many people today seem to not care about what the issue over Erap's trial is about or what is controversial about the National Broadband Network deal. A lot of adults point at the youth as being apathetic but, in fact, a huge number of people - regardless of age, gender, and even social class - are guilty of this as well. In a time when vigilance has become a necessity to ensure our rights are respected and our interests served, apathy is becoming a dominant sentiment in our society today.

I would like to believe that I am a bit of a notch above those who are apathetic to the concerns of society. Knowing is a whole lot different from caring since the latter involves action which I sometimes fail to actually carry out. But I always want to look at the bigger picture and try to search for the truth as much as a 17-year-old student can in this age of unlimited internet access and 24-hour news coverage. The main motivation for me is that I know I will be affected, in one way or another, by what the Senate hearings are about, how big the budget deficit is, or what the verdict of the Supreme Court is on an issue (nevermind the notion of seeing history-in-the-making first hand hehehe). A minority (fortunately a significant minority) see politics and the concern of the greater society as something worth looking in to.

Our capitalist society today is based on the principle that each person is selfish. As Adam Smith puts it in his theory of the invisible hand, in an ideal market economy, every selfish act of a selfish entity in an economy will contribute to the greater good of society. This is why competition and free trade are advocated in capitalism. Though I do not agree with this assumption, this structure of society assumes that every man is selfish - he will not do anything unless it is for his own benefit. I believe this is a big part of the whole root of apathy - that every man thinks only of himself.

I have had quite a number of experiences that have shown me this dark side of humanity. When the school calls for a relief goods drive for victims of a typhoon, very few answer the call. The reasons are varied but perhaps the most frustrating one is that a Starbucks frappuchino is far more important than one day's worth of food for a family. Why should I sacrifice my comfort for people I do not even know?

This selfishness of man is not, of course, the sole cause of apathy. This paradigm still holds even if you look at the instances in our history when people actually went beyond apathy. The Philippine Revolution of the 1890s. The war effort during World War II. EDSA I. EDSA II. All these examples show that the Filipinos can actually stop apathy no matter what the motivations are. Some are altruistic, others selfish,but all contributed to the success of movements that brought social change to our nation. In a more localized setting, the notion of Ateneans being apathetic is somewhat proven wrong by the sheer amount of criticism the implementation of a dress code has received in the past weeks. Again, some of the motivations are noble in the defense of the rights of students while others are more selfish in the pursuit of personal interests to keep their wardrobe and still wear slippers. Selfishness, in all these instances, can actually work to stop apathy but only if man sees the use of caring for his own betterment.

It is when selfishness is combined with another cause that it most likely will translate into apathy. Man is inevitably short-sighted. Despite our tremendous capacity to use our mental faculties to think beyond the abilities of any other creature, we simply cannot pierce through the veil of the future. We think more in terms of today and very seldom of tomorrow. We enjoy today because, as the saying goes, there may not be tomorrow. The same short-sightedness can cause apathy when we are unable to perceive how something could affect our lives in the long run. Most of the big changes in the history of humanity did not come in just one blow. The same is true with politics and the concerns of society. A new law like the Human Security Act passed today may suddenly or gradually change our way of life and we wouldn't even know it because of our apathy. Responsible voting in an election may not translate into food for the table tomorrow but we often fail to see that it could very well affect how much we earn in the coming years.

Looking even deeper into the complicated causes of apathy, it can be observed that selfishness and short-sightedness assume that we have the capacity to think about the bigger picture. However, in our country, not everyone has that luxury. I agree that since our nation is predominantly poor, the bigger cause of apathy is that a larger part of our nation simply cannot think beyond what they have to eat for dinner. What happens is that the minority of those who can shape how society would benefit them and not the poor who are robbed of their opportunity to not be apathetic because of the stigma of poverty. Poverty is a problem that can be solved by government policies, political will and social change. Following the assumptions of selfishness and short-sightedness, the higher classes will not initiate these changes for the poor. The poor cannot push these themselves because their poverty has kept them focused on trying to survive day after day. A big number of our people are deprived of the education that would have allowed them to understand how politics and society work and how they can push for change. An even bigger number simply have to worry about more immediate matters such as food and rents over education. Political apathy and economic degeneration is a chicken-and-egg situation - one cannot clearly discern which came first. Does the economy worsen because people do not care? Or are people too poor already to care anyway?

Apathy, like any other human behavior, is too complex to be understood completely. But the bigger matter is not understanding its causes but acting on it. The fact of the matter is that most of the problems in our society today can be solved if people were actually not apathetic. Corruption can be mitigated with vigilance. Poverty can be fought by a combination of altruistic volunteerism in the short run and revolutionary social change in the long run. Our society and government are structured so that the people get what they deserve - if people are not responsible, society and government will not work for them.

The many events in the past and the things that are happening now has led me to believe that indeed the root of apathy is selfishness, short-sightedness and ignorance. Perhaps this is an incomplete picture but what is clear is that the only answer to this is to show the apathetic that by stopping indifference, we can actually make a difference in this selfish, short-sighted and ignorant world.

I spoke too soon

2007-10-09T04:55:00.000-07:00

What Marvel Hero would you be?
created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Professor X

Superhuman mental powers: Professor X ordinarily possesses vast psionic powers, including telepathy; the ability to induce in others mental illusions, temporary mental or physical paralysis, and loss of specific memories or total amnesia; the projection of "mental bolts" to stun or render a person unconscious; astral projection; and the ability to sense other superhuman mutants within a small radius

Professor X

85%

DareDevil

60%

Spider-Man

35%

Blade

35%

The Hulk

25%

Wolverine

25%

Okay, I spoke too soon. Haha. Of course, over all these guys, Charles is the nerdiest type which suits me just fine. Haha.

Illuminati

2007-10-09T04:48:00.000-07:00

Which member of the Marvel Illuminati are you?
created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Mr. Fantastic

You are Reed Richards, Mr. Fantastic. As leader of the Fantastic Four, you are a veteran of the superhero community. You are a brilliant scientist and provide a unique analytical perspective to the Illuminati that's backed up by years of expirience. Family is very important to you, and you don't fight unless it's absolutely neccicary.

Mr. Fantastic

71%

Black Panter

68%

Iron Man

57%

Dr. Strange

54%

Prof. Xavier

54%

Black Bolt

46%

Namor

32%

Cool quiz! hahaha. I would have wanted to be Charles Xavier, but fine, Mr. Fantastic is great as well. I find it funny that I've been reading a lot of Marvel stuff these past few weeks via marvel.com (they have free digital comics and an encyclopedia of almost every marvel character in the marvel universe).

I've learned a lot more about the "dark sides" of these guys by reading actual comics as compared to just watching the animated series or the movies. I find Marvel great because they give a human side (both good and bad) to these superhuman guys. Weighing between Xavier and Mr. Fantastic based on their dark sides, I'd like Mr. Fantastic more but Xavier's power is still something great to have.

Something to remember 11

2007-10-04T06:05:00.000-07:00

My life is an instant,
An hour which passes by;
My life is a moment
Which I have no power to stay.
You know, O my God,
That to love You here on earth -
I have only today.

- Prayer of St. Therese of Liseux

Something to remember 10

2007-09-05T07:23:00.001-07:00

"How can you believe, when you accept praise from one another and do not seek the praise that comes from the only God?" - John 5:44

The world today measures us in so many ways
Grades. Proficiency in sports. Awards. Positions. ...

that we tend to forget what measure is most important in our lives:
How much do you love the God who is your purpose, your destination and your guide in life?

Something to remember 9

2007-09-05T07:10:00.000-07:00

"If you belonged to the world, the world would love its own; but because you do not belong to the world, and I have chosen you out of the world, the world hates you."
- John 15:19

How can the world show its hate for you?
It hates the faithful - those whom it has labeled irrational for believing in a God who cannot be comprehended by the human mind.
It hates the righteous - those whom it sees as stupid for following the rules when no one can catch you break them.
It hates the generous - those whom it cannot understand because everything in the world has a price.
It hates the hopeful - those whom it marked as extreme optimists who deny the realities of the world.

Remain faithful, righteous, generous and hopeful. Remain in love with God. Because you do not belong to the world but rather you belong to God.

Dry Spell

2007-08-22T22:10:00.000-07:00

Drought

Unable to materialize ideas

Too little time

Frustrated with so many things

Can't fix them

Storm without rain

All in the mind

My first GK build

2007-08-11T02:15:00.000-07:00

It's so great to be an Atenean. We have more holidays than the average university. But I guess the best thing about it is how these holidays are spent. July 31 was the feast day of St. Ignatius of Loyola and we chose to spend it at GK Blue Eagle Village at Payatas Trese. It was my first ever GK build so I was filled with excitement because I would get to experience something that has inspired hundreds of thousands of people to do more for our nation by giving more of themselves to the poor.

However, to be brutally honest, I felt very disappointed in the first part of the day. All we did was to form a human chain that will bring cement from the drop off point (the place that trucks could reach) to the build site (where the road is too narrow to accommodate vehicles). I understand the significance of the activity since it would have taken loads of labor hours to transfer the needed cement to the other side. However, I did not feel the inspiration I was looking for. It seemed pointless. I felt that if we just taught Math or English to the kids in the area, it would have benefitted the community more since it seems not a lot of their kids go to school (too many kids were around and it was a weekday).

The second part of the day was even more depressing. We continued work on transferring the cement and haha now I know what factory workers in the Industrial Age felt when they did monotonous assembly line work. It was so unfulfilling. Seeing your work steadily coming to form is really pushes you to work – to see what the final outcome will be. But I was in the middle of the chain and you simply couldn’t gauge how much cement you’ve already brought to the site. Would it have been enough to build a house? These were questions popping up in my head while I was passing bucket after bucket of cement to my team mates. I was thinking about a lot of things that time. I was trying to find some significance to what I was doing. Earlier in the day, I had prayed that God be with me in this work, that I will offer everything I will do that day to Him. But what kind of work was I doing? It didn’t seem important and significant. I didn’t feel it was nation building at all.

The biggest disappointment that I got from the experience was that there were a lot of able-bodied men just sitting around there talking to friends, sitting around, doing practically nothing. GK was supposed to give people the chance to work for the type of community they deserve. Why weren’t they working with us? I would have understood if they were working – I’m sure they needed to work to feed their families. But they were just chilling out while some students were giving time and effort to build better homes for them. This wasn’t the GK I had thought it was.

But God is so great, He didn’t want me to leave the place without actually understanding what I had done that day and what GK really stood for.

One of the members of the homeowners’ association in the Blue Eagle Village offered her home for us to rest for lunch and in the afternoon. It was a two-storey house with a floor area equal to an average classroom. They had a TV, a sewing machine, a rice cooker, a washing machine, two electric fans, a bathroom inside the house (meaning they had running water and proper drainage) and a marble countertop. But to me, the best characteristic of their house is that it smelled clean and almost insect-free. I saw one rat but our house has rats as well. The slum areas I’ve been to always have the distinct smell of garbage and with it, an army of mosquitoes, flies and cockroaches. You could easily tell that they were far from abject poverty. You could tell they were doing well enough to eat three times a day, send the kids to public schools and watch the daily telenovelas at night.

We had a chance to talk to her a little about her family. Our nanay is already 50 years old, I’m guessing married for more than 30 years already because she has a 30 year old (not sure), 25+ year old and an 18 year old. They were originally from Pampanga but her husband worked as a taxi driver here in Quezon City. Of course, it was impractical to be travelling back and forth from Pampanga to the Metro so it was inevitable that they would search for a more permanent home here. They already had relatives in Payatas Trece so that was the place to go. But nanay decided to delay their migration to Metro Manila because she wanted her children to grow up in the province and hopefully be inculcated with provincial values. She felt that there was a higher tendency for children brought up in the city to be exposed to vices so she really made it a point for them to grow up the way she thought was best in Pampanga.
They eventually decided to set-up a home in Payatas Trece (a slum area for informal settlers) and she tells us that the first months they were here, they really had to go to the Payatas dumpsite to look for materials for their house. They started out with the traditional squatter home made of discarded cardboards for walls and rusty metal panels for a roof. But at the very least, they had a livelihood with the husband working as a taxi driver and nanay working part time as a laundry woman. They were able to send to of their children to college but unfortunately were not able to finish. They’re trying really hard to have their last child graduate with a nursing degree even if the husband is nearing retirement age.

You could tell they were really an industrious family – working really hard for long-term goals. They were able to save enough and borrow enough to build a house. She told us it cost a total of around Php 200,000 (explains the marble countertop and working drainage system). Her neighbors thought they were actually rich but she explained they had to borrow money to have it built and had to work doubly hard to pay for it.

She seems to really believe in Gawad Kalinga for her to support it despite the fact that the house that will be built for them would cost less than what they had invested for their current home plus the stress of having to live somewhere else first while it was being constructed. She explains there are still problems confronting full implementation of the proposed GK village because not everyone in the area thought it was just too good to be true. She told us that GK provides for free the construction materials and the family needed only to find at least two people who were knowledgeable in building houses. The volunteers coming from the Ateneo Alumni Association and Ateneo students would not necessitate hiring too many laborers for the house and she says that on the average, each house only requires a month for construction (our house took 11 months to finish!). And well, she corrected my earlier assumption that people here didn’t work to build their own community. They had regular laborers from the community itself who leads the construction of the houses. And perhaps the biggest help GK gave to the community was that they pushed for a collective buying of the entire Payatas Trece property so that their homes would be secure from demolitions of informal settling communities.

This was the part that showed me what GK really stood for. Here was a family who had strived so hard to work for their own betterment and succeeded to a certain degree. But they were very willing to give up what they had worked for just for the idea of a better community, a Payatas Trece that had clean and concrete housing that was secure from the threat of demolitions. GK is not really so much about building houses but rather building communities. It was not about how much cement we had brought to the build site or how much time we had spent working on the houses. Though having clean, spacious and sturdy housing is a part of it, a community-building is more about uniting the people within it with an idea that they could all work together for themselves. The volunteers were there to help them out, to lend a hand in their community building. And how was this nation building? If communities could be built with an idea of progress through communal effort, a nation could be built with that same idea. You have people from all social classes, hailing from different backgrounds and areas of expertise working on the same level to help build communities. This was what GK was about. And this was what I did that day. By being part of that human chain, by passing buckets of cement, we were one step at a time building a better community in the area of Payatas Trece and in a small way building a better nation for them and for ourselves. For me, it is in this solidarity that GK inspires this spirit of nation building.

The tagline of GK is Bawat Pilpino, Bayani. Heroism is about sacrificing yourself for a noble and just cause. Gawad Kalinga is exactly that type of cause. As students, we were sacrificing a little of our time and effort to help out in this great cause of nation building. The family we talked to would have to sacrifice a decade’s worth of hard work for this cause. I find true inspiration in this idea of great sacrifice for a great cause, more for the benefit of others. To be honest, it has inspired me more to give more of myself to this cause. The great thing about this cause of nation building is that it is not limited to building houses. We have been blessed with our own strengths and own unique skills. It is by using these can we give a more unique and significant contribution to building this nation.
So in the next build, I’m sure to come with a renewed sense of purpose. God showed me in this first GK build showed me first hand what this purpose was. God, in the next builds, will allow me to do more for that purpose, to give more of myself to build a community, to build a nation.

Something to remember 9

2007-08-08T18:43:00.000-07:00

"What profit is there for one to gain the whole world and forfeit his life?" - Mark 8:36

I heard this way back during the Mass celebrated in honor of St. Ignatius of Loyola. I found it amazing that this one line caused St. Francis Xavier to realign his priorities and set it on God. He was a very promising young man, as Fr. Ben described him, handsome, intelligent, athletic. He could have succeeded in whatever field he chose to engage in but in the end, he chose the path to God.

The pursuits of this world are very very distracting. Our short-sightedness often lures us to ways that lead to pits and dead ends. I pray God will grant us the grace to overcome such distractions and to fix our eyes on Him alone, to set our sights on the Giver and Source of everlasting life.

Superpower

2007-07-31T05:56:00.000-07:00

Got this from Clar.

Your Superpower Should Be Manipulating Fire

You are intense, internally driven, and passionate.
Your emotions are unpredictable - and they often get the better of you.
Both radiant and terrifying, people are drawn to you.
At your most powerful, you feel like the world belongs to you.

Why you would be a good superhero: You are obsessive enough to give it your all

Your biggest problem as a superhero: Your moodiness would make it difficult to control your powers

What Should Your Superpower Be?

It's somewhat true but I hope to work on my biggest problem because lately, it's been showing more and more often. I used to pride myself with being professional and not succumbing to moodiness. But I guess adolescence does affect everyone. I know I am more passionate about things I believe in and well passion often affects the emotions more than any other aspect of the person.

And one more thing. I don't like my power - manipulating fire because I feel it is too dependent on the amount of oxygen present in the system. Sad naman I can't use my powers siguro in outer space or in oxygen-deprived atmospheres :(

Choice

2007-07-14T20:41:00.000-07:00

The past movies I've seen that had maximum media exposure but really very little new to offer but amazing special effects all seem to have the same theme or subtheme. "Everything is a choice." To be specific, the movies are "Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer", "Spiderman 3" and "Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix".

In Fantastic Four, this theme is clearly depicted in the Silver Surfer who was to serve Galactus as his herald in exchange for the survival of his planet. He later realized, after Sue Storm gave up her life to save him, that what she was saying was true: that indeed he can choose to fight the planet-eating being and that he could choose to save Earth. He did and seemingly repelled the doom facing the planet.

In Spiderman 3, this is shown in the internal struggle of Spiderman with Venom, the symbiotic alien lifeform that seemed to amplify the darkness in his being. While on one level he was trying to keep his identity and trying to save New York, on another he was struggling with problems with his lover, his best friend and other human concerns. In the end, he decides he wishes to detach himself from Venom and in the end defeated the villians with help from his best friend.

In Harry Potter, the plot focused on Harry himself although in the book it had a lot of subplots. This theme is clearly seen in the last part where he had to battle Voldemort in his own consciousness to keep his identity. Dumbledore says it very clearly: It is the choices we make that make us who we are.

I really have no problems with this theme because I personally believe it as well. God gave us two gifts that clearly defines our humanity: intellect and free will. I do not believe in the idea of suppressing choice because it is simply impossible. If God Himself has decided to respect the free will of His creatures, what can we do to subject others to our will? Every event in our lives is a choice. Sometimes, we feel that we have no choice not because we really don't have it but we are afraid to face to consequences of our choice. A slave, even if he is supposed to be bound to the will of his master, can easily choose to rebel. Even if he does not succeed, clearly, it is his choice whether or not to serve his master. Every choice has a consequence just as every action has a reaction. Sometimes, it is this consequence that keep us from believing that we have a choice. We often choose to chain ourselves but it is our choice to make.

The great thing about these three movies is that they depict the power of choice in its most extreme form. In Fantastic Four, the Silver Surfer overcomes the fear of losing his own planet and decides to save Earth and eventually succeeds. In Spiderman 3, Spiderman chooses to do the right thing and saves the day in the end. In Harry Potter, Harry decides to not succumb to the power of Voldemort. Even in seemingly insurmountable odds, choice prevails.

An additional theme is, if you choose to side with what is good and right, you will eventually but surely succeed. Heroes are called heroes because in the eyes of others they did the right thing. And again this theme holds true in real life. The good and right is always the winning side. If we choose to side with it, success is inevitable. Every choice has a consequence and oftentimes, it seems goodness is rewarded by injustice and sacrifice. But again just as in all the movies. choosing to be heroic is choosing to be victorious.

Vindication of my choice haha.

2007-07-14T17:43:00.000-07:00

You scored as Biology/Chemistry/Geology, You should strongly consider majoring (or minoring) in Biology, Chemistry, Geology, or related majors (e.g., Biochemistry, Environmental Science, Forestry, Fisheries and Wildlife, Genetics, Marine Biology, Zoology).

It is possible that the best major for you is your 2nd, 3rd, or even 5th listed category, so be sure to consider ALL majors in your OTHER high scoring categories (below). You may score high in a category you didnt think you would--it is possible that a great major for you is something you once dismissed as not for you. The right major for you will be something 1) you love and enjoy and 2) are really great at it.

Consider adding a minor or double majoring to make yourself standout and to combine your interests. Please post your results in your myspace/blog/journal.

Biology/Chemistry/Geology

100%

PoliticalScience/Philosophy

94%

Religion/Theology

88%

History/Anthropology/LiberalArts

88%

Education/Counseling

75%

HR/BusinessManagement

75%

English/Journalism/Comm

75%

Nursing/AthleticTraining/Health

69%

Accounting/Finance/Marketing

69%

Psychology/Sociology

69%

Physics/Engineering/Computer

69%

French/Spanish/OtherLanguage

56%

Mathematics/Statistics

56%

Visual&PerformingArts

31%

WHAT MAJOR IS RIGHT FOR YOU?
created with QuizFarm.com

But this quiz is not very helpful if you're not really decided on what you want in life. I mean questions like are you good in math will obviously direct what major is right for you. Sometimes (in my experience) what you're really good at is not exactly the best course for you and vice versa haha.

Something to remember 8

2007-07-10T08:30:00.000-07:00

"But the Pharisees said, "He drives out demons by the prince of demons." - Matthew 9:34

The Pharisees were some of the most well educated people in Israel during the time of Jesus. And yet they seem to have been ignorant of the fact when a miracle of God was being performed before their eyes. This reminds us that knowledge of the world must not keep us from truly knowing God. Sometimes, the more we know, the more closed we are to God's surprises - events and experiences beyond human comprehension and explanation. Seek knowledge of God and the knowledge of the world will follow. Be open to God's surprises and let God take the wheel.

Because it comes only once in a millenium...

2007-07-07T07:51:00.000-07:00

Eto na ang tamang time to pay tribute to the best batch the world has ever and will ever see - BATCH 2007! (planned to post this on the actual 07/07/07 day but due to unforeseen circumstances duh di ko nagawa haha)

This "topic" is one of the most difficult to organize because of the sheer volume of the memories, lessons, victories and defeats I had in Pisay. I've been meaning to write a tribute for the past few months but there was something keeping me from doing it. More than laziness, it's like once you pay tribute to something, the experience is over and you're just looking at it in retrospect. But I realized no, this is just the beginning, because the Pisay 07 experience will last a lifetime.

So let me start with Emerald, my first year section. I found my lifelong barkada here and for that I am really thankful. I didn't really have a lot of REAL friends before but when I came to Emerald, people had this very welcoming atmosphere and we had so much in common. Kung wala ang Eme, siguro di ako makakasurvive ng Pisay. Maraming nangyari nun internally na siguro di ko pinapansin pero ngayon narealize ko na hindi lang puro gimik ang natutunan ko sa Eme. Most of the best experiences I've had in the past four years I've shared with these guys. Nandito ang best friends ko, ang soulmate ko lahat. At dito ko nasimulang marealize na marami pang bagay na mas mahalaga sa academics - like friendships. And for all of that and more, maraming maraming salamat.

Kung sa Emerald ko nahanap ang lifelong friends ko, sa Champaca ko nameet most of the best people makikilala ko ever in my life. Kumpleto sa Champaca more than the nerds kumpleto talaga. May leaders, may athletes, may math wizards, may science geeks, may mga loveteams, may ... basta lahat ng facets ng batch natin nasama sa Champaca. At the best part is kahit na gaano kadiverse ang section na toh, united pa rin at talagang nattranslate into quantitative victories. Sa Champaca ko nakita ang full potential kapag lahat ng tao sa batch nagtutulong-tulong to achieve a goal. Sa Champaca ang most active egroup ko haha. Sa Champaca one moment naguusap kayo tungkol sa Geom, the next Magic cards na. Grabe talaga. Best section ever pa rin ang Champaca. Champaca Forever talaga :D

Di tulad sa Champaca na collective as a section ang usually na pagtingin, sa Beryllium, dapat pala individuals ang tinitignan. Nung una parang di ko nagustuhan ang Be kasi di ako sanay. Nasanay ako sa Champaca, masyado. Pero buti na lang sa middle of the year mas naenjoy ko na ang Be. Mas marami akong nakilala sa Batch natin at mas nakita ko ang mga tao not as mere classmates but as individual friends - ung hindi lang friends dahil magclassmate lang kayo o magkagroup kayo. Pero talagang kaibigan. Dito ko nakilala ang mga taong di ko akalaing magiging kaibigan ko pala. Surprises ang nakuha ko sa Be at lahat yun pleasant at astig.

Sa Graviton, haha nasanay na rin ako sa Be. Mas ginusto kong personal ang level ng pakikipagkilala over section. At sa panahon ding ito mas naging focused ako sa buong batch over sa section lang. Kung sa Be andami kong nakilala na di ko akalaing makikilala ko, sa Grav mas dumoble pa yun. Sa Graviton talaga mas halo-halo lahat, lahat ng pedeng characteristic na maipangdedescribe mo sa batch natin, mahahanap mo sa Graviton. astig ang Grav dahil sa mga taong kasama nun. at minsan nagsisisi ako kasi parang kulang pa yung panahon na nagugol ko sa Grav.

Ang isa sa mga pinakamalaking bahagi ng buhay ko sa Pisay ay ang Batch Council. Sobrang dami kong natutunan sa tatlong taon ko dito, hindi kakasya sa blog siguro kung ililista ko (figuratively haha). Pero what it made me sure of was my passion for service through organized leadership. Lahat naman sa batch natin leaders in their own way at palagay ko lang dito ko nahanap ung niche. That passion was there long before Pisay but it consumed me all the more nung nasa Pisay na. I believe God started that fire in me at I thank Him kasi through the confidence of my batchmates, hindi namatay yung fire na yun.

Salamat din sa AstroSoc. More than the overnight stargazings at fun races and stuff, ang saya saya to be serving a really really big group (bigger than the batch). Ang cool kasi noong bata pa lang ako dream ko nang maging astronomer at kahit papaano I got a chance to get closer to that dream through AstroSoc.

Salamat sa Journ. Kasi marami akong natutunan (na hindi related sa Journ) haha na magagamit ko sa buhay ko. Grabe. I met the best people in Journ, people na di ko inexpect na magiging kaibigan ko at natrain ako to REALLY cram haha, stay up late, and a lot more. haha. Ito ang isa sa mga funnest experiences ko sa Pisay at talagang hindi ko pa rin pinagsisisihan na nagJourn ako sa kabila ng lahat ng hirap at pagod.

Salamat sa SCA at sa YFC kasi isa kayo sa naging tulay para mas makilala ko pa si God. Ang ironic pero kahit nasa secular school ako, nahanap ko si God sa Pisay through all the experiences and all the people I've met and everything that has happened in my life in the past four years. SCA at YFC helped me grow more in the faith at appreciate more ang pagiging isang Catholic at Christian. Marami rin akong nahanap ditong mga kaibigan na sure na forever ko magiging kaibigan kasi ang nagbobond sa amin ay ang pagmamahal ni God. Ang cool talaga ni God kasi nilagay Niya ako sa isang secular school para mas maappreciate ko pa lalo ang ginagawa Niya para sa akin.

Salamat sa mga nakakasama ko sa mga contests at iba pang activities. Noon iniisip ko, grabe ang gagagaling ng mga batchmates ko asa pa akong mapanglalaban ako. Pero galing ni God kasi kahit papaano He pushed me to strive for excellence at well yun natupad naman ang pangarap kong dalin ang pangalan ng Pisay sa mga competitions. I had my share of defeats and victories but everything was part of God's plan at lahat ng yun nagcontribute to make me the person I am today.

At finally super thank you sa buong BATCH 2007 kasi ang astig astig talaga. But the biggest thank you goes to GOD kasi Siya ang nagplano na malagay tayo sa iisang batch. Sabi ng ibang tao fishing ako, sabi ng iba humble pero kung may maipagmamalaki ako, yun ay ang fact na 07 ako. Ibang klase kasi sa 07. United not only by our experiences but our love of God. Ang bait ng lahat ng tao sa batch, matalino lahat, magaling lahat. Sabi ng ibang tao idealistic daw ako masyado to the point na naive na. Pero dahil yun sa batch na toh kasi pinakita nito sa akin na posible pala na lahat ng tao magwowork for a common and noble goal. Blessing talaga na lahat tayo gumraduate at feeling ko plan na yun talaga ni God para ipakita sa mundo how great His plan is nung pinagsama-sama Niya tayo. Grabe talaga. grabe. grabe. grabe. Our batch is what should give others hope for our nation. Kasi tayo na yung inaantay nila. I really believe our batch will make a difference in this world at it's only a matter of time before it happens. Kaya sana walang limutan, kasi marami pa tayong gagawin. Tong four years na toh simula pa lang yan. Marami pang parating.

Sabi nila 07/07/07 ang araw natin, araw ng 07. pero I say lahat ng araw, araw natin. 07/07/07 comes only once a millenium, a fleeting moment in the eternity of time. Pero palagay ko all of us sa batch 2007 are destined to leave a lasting mark of greatness in this world.

BATCH 2007 mahal ko kayong lahat. :D

Something to remember 7

2007-07-01T20:06:00.000-07:00

"Foxes have dens and birds of the sky have nests, but the Son of Man has nowhere to rest his head." - Luke 9:58

Each human being is the temple of the Holy Spirit, an abode for God. There are times, however, when we choose to close the door and not let Him in. What an injustice it is to not be allowed to enter your own house.

If Mcdo is open 24/7 for us, shouldn't we all the more do the same for the Almighty God?

Climate Change

2007-07-01T19:35:00.000-07:00

It's been four weeks since the start of our college life and I'm beginning to to realize I'm really not a student of Pisay anymore. Can you imagine how dense I am? I've been attending classes, activities and stuff all this time and the realization that "Hey, I'm not a Pisay student anymore" came just a few days/hours/minutes back (I'm actually not sure).

Sadly, the confusion in my life right now, what many call the adjustment stage is taking its toll on this blog. I attended a time management seminar (courtesy of the Chem Department for all freshmen Chem majors) and if there was one thing it made me realize, is that I can plan things but I can never completely follow it. And it's really a bad thing.

My parents often tell me sobra na yang computer (gaming) mo ah! or sobra na yang dvd (actually house/smallville) mo ah!. The tendency of most adolescents of course is to deny such claims and tell them e tapos na akong mag-aral e. This fortunately happens only in the weekends and I really mean it (usually) when I say I'm done. The time management seminar made me realize I've been wasting my time.

I started playing computer games when I was six or seven years old. I think the first games I played were Mario and then Dune, Starcraft, Command and Conquer etc etc. I've played so many games (PC, Sega, PS) and it's more than the number of books I've actually read in my life. So I grew up with the paradigm that my life wasn't complete without playing games.

The seminar was great because the speaker delivered it with such a compelling argument. This is roughly what he said, The time you waste doing those unimportant and not urgent things could have been spent doing more important things, studying, catching up with friends and most importantly serving others and God. And it hit me.

Every weekend, I'll set a schedule for myself and specifically give time for playing. Because
of the nature of games I play (usually long strategy games), I tend to not follow the schedule and eat up more of my study time. It doesn't affect my studies because I make it a point to finish everything I need to do before the weekend ends (even if I have to sleep late). But the sad part is I neglect some of the other important stuff that I could have done. I could have had a chat with a batchmate, watched an episode of pokemon with my little brother, read a book due at the end of the sem, prayed a lot more, read an extra chapter in the Bible, all those important stuff. This also includes not being able to write a blog entry. This is really important to me because it helps me analyze the stuff I think about and I really get something out of it.

So I must confess that the reason it was all cloudless here for the past four weeks is because I've been playing a lot and the assignments had began pouring. The last game I played was Disciples II. I've finished it before but it's so fulfilling to finish it at a higher difficulty level but it takes twice the time to finish. I have to deal with finishing a mission for that game and prepare prelabs and postlabs and other stuff at the same time.

I had a wonderful conversation with a friend which gave me a powerful image by which I could see my problem with gaming. It helped me reexamine what I thought was just harmless. It's like a chain that keeps me from reaching my full potential and ultimately showing my love for God. When I thought about it, I play games because I want to enjoy, to unwind, to satisfy myself. God had very little part in the equation being "I need to unwind so I could be a better Christian" which is just stupid. There is only true delight in the Lord and basically the fun I get from gaming is artificial, temporary and all together pointless.

So my resolution is to quit gaming at least for this sem. And you'll be seeing more clouds here every weekend because the time I've freed from not gaming will be spent in my other neglected but important activities.

Hopefully God will grant me the strength to break this chain completely. I hope you help me in this task by praying for me.

The Ateneo Way

2007-06-07T03:53:00.001-07:00

I've been exposed to Atenean culture for the past three days and so far, I'm not regretting my decision. Sometimes, I still think about what my life could have been if I chose UP Diliman, Manila or La Salle. These thoughts are processed unconsciously whenever I hear about experiences of my friends in those schools. It seemed a week ago that I may have been missing a lot. But a few days into my new life as part of the Ateneo, I'd tell them that as well.

Many people ask me why I chose Ateneo. My parents would often jokingly answer that question with "mas mahal kasi tuition dun e, para mas sulit ang scholarship :p", because I'm not sure I've explained my decision well enough to them. It's really complicated and no single reason is strong enough to stand alone.

I'll start with the wrong reasons people often use to explain this. No, I am not from Ateneo Grade School. No, my brother is not from Ateneo Grade School. No, my parents did not graduate from the Ateneo. It seems Ateneo, or college in general, is seen as a family tradition, with the choice of school as hereditary. Though I plan to "aggresively persuade" my children to study in Pisay, I will still give them a choice, just as my parents have always given me a choice.

No, I was not forced by my parents, because on the contrary, my mom had some other school in mind for me while my dad remained neutral about the matter. It's a great feeling to be trusted with one of the most important decisions of anyone's life.

No, I did not go to Ateneo because we're rich. ANLABO NITO. The only reason Ateneo was in the choices was because I got a scholarship. Thus, this proves that I do not fit in the usual perceived social class of people in the Ateneo.

I originally did not want to have to decide something as important as this. But as many have pointed out and I've been made to realize myself, God gave me the power to choose, unlike most who were forced to one school or one course because there were no other options. It was a blessing in many ways but perhaps the most important is that it was training on trusting yourself when you know that God Himself trusts you to make the decision. It's both empowering and assuring. The implication is that whatever I choose, God would be with me. :D

I did not really imagine myself enrolling in Chemistry/ Material Science Engineering prior to the Ateneo Junior Summer Seminar. I must admit that it was one of the biggest influences on why I chose Ateneo. As someone pointed out, I could have simply fallen into a marketing trick, showing the best of what it has to offer but hiding its worse features. But still stand by this statement: Ateneo is so much like Pisay.

Other considerations I had included the versatility of the course, employment opportunities and an opportunity for holistic development and leadership training. One thing that I really wanted was Catholic education. Though I must admit, I grew in my faith during the time I was away from the rigid religion class, I feel now I am ready to appreciate what I will be taught in theology classes. Though as people say, I could continue to grow in my faith even without theology, I believe a combination of service and study would allow me to see God in a wider perspective. As Jason pointed out in one conversation today, we choose something because we think we will find happiness there. As I have pointed out in earlier posts, true happiness is that which springs from an eternal meaning, which is God. I am extremely confident I will find more of God at the Ateneo (building upon what I found out about Him in Pisay). Not that I would not find Him in any other place but connected to what I said earlier, choosing this school is in fact trusting that He would be with me wherever I choose. This is the choice I made and I'm sure I will know more about Him in this newest journey of my life.

So that's the basic explanation. Haha. I tried an objective approach to this by making a list of categories and giving points per category. It wasn't really helpful because at one time, the scores for the two choices, Intarmed and Chem/MSE, were tied!

The three days at the Ateneo has given me a very surprising impression. Haha. It seems Ateneo has one stark difference with Pisay: it is not people-based! I have yet to understand the inner workings of the Atenean society but so far, this has been my impression. The most compelling evidence is that Ateneo seems to have translated in actual rules and written guidelines many of what may seem to be unwritten traditions in the university setting. Imagine having a Magna Carta of Student Rights and a whole talk on how to relate to teachers. Plus the fact that there will be one whole class on Ateneo Culture for the rest of the sem! Grabe. I suppose this is why most graduates of the Ateneo share a common impression of the whole experience. This is very different from what I hear from UP graduates who seem to have a different story to tell about their experience. Learning about UP culture is more of based on experience unlike the rigid structure of learning the Ateneo cutlure.

But come to think of it, Ateneo is people-based in a strange way. From my observations, it seems the people-based system has been deliberately encoded in the rule-based structure of the Ateneo. This is most evident in the way the enrollment and the Orsem have been mostly handled (efficiently!) by the students. The student organizations at the Ateneo seem to have a certain degree of autonomy but always within the minimum framework set by the school. This freedom seems to be enough to allow for the development of ingenuity, ability to adapt and innovation.

And I have to applaud the efficiency of the way they do things at the Ateneo. I know in real life this will rarely happen, but at least I have experienced what government should aim to achieve.

I am really looking forward to the five years I will spend at the Ateneo. :D

God's instant messenger

2007-06-06T06:48:00.000-07:00

I'd like to think that's how He listens to our prayers. He has this super fast dsl connection that defies the laws of physics by beating even the speed of light. This connection passes through all matter (energy na rin para sa mga physics nerds dyan haha) and reaches all His creation. He's sitting in front of His super fast computer waiting for any one of His billions of children to send Him an instant message through prayer.com or something.

Ang labo. haha. But lately, God has been answering questions I never thought I'd ask so quickly and I'm just so overwhelmed. The correct way to look at it is I've been checking my messenger more often and I've turned up my speaker volume a little higher so I could hear His buzz tones better.

God is great :D

Troubling questions

2007-06-04T04:48:00.000-07:00

What makes work good and honorable?

Do the means justify the end?

Is ignorance an excuse?

Is real effort and honest intentions enough?

Is a creator guilty is his creation is used for the wrong causes?

Is he guilty if he creates and knows that it will be used that way?

Can the benefits cover the wrongs?

Do honest and kind intentions transform this guilt into motivation?

Can I find God in my work?

The People-based Theory

2007-05-31T17:07:00.000-07:00

I've always wondered why the Philippine Science High School, despite being a government institution, retains its reputation as the premier high school of the country.

Government institutions - hospitals, schools, police and fire stations included - have always been seen as inefficient and sometimes even ineffective in delivering the services expected of them. There are many reasons cited to explain this very dismal evaluation of government services. Lack of funding, corruption and incompetence are some of the most often cited. But why does it seem that Pisay has acquired an immunity to this contagious inefficiency spreading in the government?

I've often observed that there is an excess of freedom and discretion in Pisay. Its structure is basically having a person in-charge and everything under him is under his discretion. Apparently, there are so few rules in Pisay that a fine line now exists between guidelines and actual rules (the former being recommendations only) as pointed out by a member of the faculty (ayaw ko na ireveal haha). As another teacher has observed, most of the rules we have in Pisay are responses to actual events and not products of foresight (as I think they should be).

This unstructured structure, no matter how messy it looks, seems to be the magic that makes Pisay the way it is. One way of viewing it is lack of governing rules. The other more positive perception is a people-based structure. The people that run the system are the most important parts. There is immense trust accorded to the people that make it work.

One fine example to prove how people-based Pisay is is Ms. Serrano. I considered her a pillar of the system, someone who would spend her best and last years serving the institution. She's been in Pisay so long, she had acquired the experience necessary to respond to new challenges facing the school. Her move to leave Pisay was a depressing surprise. I will no longer delve into the reasons why she left, but I must say that the most of the really few solid regulations Pisay has are ineffective in the perspective of doing good for the community. During our graduation practices, some of the teachers would comment "si Ma'am Serrano may alam nito e". I believe she left Pisay without effectively sharing the wisdom she acquired from her years of service to her successors. Opinion ko lang naman yun :D

One bad experience I had with this people-based phenomenon was during our short and yet strenuous stint as the members of the Student Alliance Electoral Board. Ma'am Samala had just left for New Zealand and there was no one left in Pisay who knew the nitty-gritty of running an election. We had two veteran SA officers but because none of the things that happened in this election happened during their SA years, we had no idea how it is supposed to be handled. Of course, the SA has its Election Code and Constitution. To our dismay, it did very little to help us resolve the issues. The SA has been in violation of its own code and constitution for almost half a decade already and haha it was during our watch that Pisay uncovered its defects. It seems the SA has always relied on the unwritten traditions followed by the previous administration and had not bothered to look into the paperwork. The SA was people-based and it somehow compromised one of the functions of the system. At the end of the experience, we had to make the Election Code less discretionary and more rigid (as it should really be).

It seems Pisay being people-based arises from the lack of solid rules to govern aspects of the Pisay community. It is the natural and spontaneous response of individuals who are where they are because of their ability to adapt and ingenuity.

This underlines that the people is what makes Pisay great - the heterogeneous mix of faculty, staff, administration, alumni, parents and students. The science curriculum, the intense academic load, the better-than-the-usual government facilities, the amazing activities, the intimidating name of Philippine Science High School - all simply provide the framework by which this mix of people work and interact for the good of themselves, the people around them and society in general. This system echoes the invisible hand theory of Adam Smith. The lack of rules allow people's actions to shape almost exclusively the course of the community. It is this freedom that enables growth and development at the personal and community levels. This acts as a catalyst for the students to become scientists - to acquire the necessary skills of critical thinking, individual confidence and competence, inquisitiveness and ingenuity. These are the most important lessons Pisay imparts on its students and the funny thing about it is it comes partly from being a people-based system.

The people-based system also ensures that this tradition of excellence lives on. Only the best and the brightest and the most courageous breed of students, teachers, staff and parents are attracted to be part of the system. It's a cycle that will always go in favor of Pisay.

However, it is still necessary to safeguard what little rigidity there is in the structure because these have set the ground rules for the continued evolution of Pisay. Simple rules on haircut and ID go a long way in subconsciously instilling discipline in a very fluid environment like Pisay. The community must remain conscious of when a people-based system is beneficial to it our not. Absolute power corrupts absolutely as they say and people are so prone to corruption. There must always be a balance. Fortunately, in Pisay, it seems it has found its balance.

This theory may also explain why the University of the Philippines remains the top university of the country despite being a state university. The relative autonomy UP has with respect to other state universities may account for this. It is note-worthy that the PSHS has an obvious affinity with UP with a big percentage of its graduates coming into the university and the UP President being part of the PSHS Board of Trustees.

Looking at a more macroscopic view, the people-based system seems to be more of a curse than a blessing for the government. I find it odd however that there is no lack of laws and rules to govern the country and yet the people-based system persists. I guess it's in the ethos of the people already to view the government by the people who lead them not by the institutions themselves. I'm not sure of my terms but I think the politics in the country is too patriarchal and messianic as well (Ma'am Doplon has a wonderful article on this: http://crazyadventure.wordpress.com/2007/05/30/messiah-politics). Our leaders have packaged our national institutions as extensions of themselves. That is why the MRT is not a project of the DOTC but the president and low-cost housing Mike Defensor and not the NHA. And this is also why criticizing the president as a person using the office for her personal gain is tantamount to destabilization of the entire government.

The people-based system is another reason why the Philippines is not ready for the parliamentary system. In that form of government, the leader of the nation can change overnight. The institutions must first be reformed to make them independent and self-sustaining that they do not need a prime minister or president to make them run properly.

The premise in Pisay is that good people run the system. In the national scene however, it seems the bad eggs are far more influential than the good ones. They have taken the people-based system and twisted it to their advantage. There is simply too much discretion in the national positions and this has been used often for the benefit of the leaders and not the people.

Being a democracy, I guess, has partly turned us into a people-based society. I really like democracy because a true one empowers the people. I believe we are in a true democracy and that we are simply getting what we deserve.

In conclusion, the real fuel that keeps the flame of Pisay burning is that people that run it. In the national perspective, as Sir Martin has said, it is the people that build a nation. The destiny of our nation is really in all our hands.

Something to remember 6

2007-05-30T19:30:00.001-07:00

God, grant us the serenity to accept the things we cannot change,
the courage to change the things we can,
and the wisdom to know the difference.

Something to remember 5

2007-05-30T19:22:00.000-07:00

Seek not to focus on rationalizing God and applying reason to Him. It is impossible not because God is fundamentally irrational (quite the opposite) but rather, our ability to understand and rationalize has its limits. We cannot place the infinity of God in the finite confines of our perception.

Seek rather a more personal understanding of God. Narrow the search and look for what is important. Love, hope and believe in Him. It's all that matters.

Happiness

2007-05-28T08:14:00.001-07:00

It's funny how I proved to myself partially the last paragraph of my previous post. Happiness is founded on and not separate from meaning. Our trip to Subic from May 24-27 was both meaningful and full of happiness in the superlative degree.

For pictures, check out my multiply: http://robroque.multiply.com

More than all the extraordinary things we did during the whole trip, it was I guess the company that made all the difference. I doubt it that if I was given a free European tour for myself only, I'd have nearly a quarter of the fun I got out of this trip. I spent most of my summer at home but now that it's about to end, I realize I've been blessed with meaningful and fun trips - Naga for ILC, Laguna with the family and Subic with my friends.

It turned out meaningful for me because it was a chance to rekindle old friendships that Pisay has inevitably pushed a bit down the priority list. But perhaps the most peculiar thing I got from the trip was that it was a learning experience for me. It taught me so many things in so many different aspects of my life. I prayed at the start of the trip that it'd get something lasting out of it. God is so great, I got more than I asked for.

On the more mundane aspects of life, I got to learn new card games like speed, egyptian and 100 and even got to develop our very own game, acceleration (3-deck speed with 6 players). I also was exposed to new and exciting group games like mafia and killers. I finally got to watch Rent and the extended versions of the Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers and the Return of the King.

I experienced a lot of new stuff like riding in a banana boat, playing frisbee on the beach, exploring Ed's vast resort and go-karting after a downpour (I'll try not to do this again - clothes get so drenched and dirty). For the first time, I rode on a car driven by someone almost my age (and now I'm excited to start driving as well). It was also the first time that I rode a car that had flat tires twice (at Pisay and near the Shell gasoline station near SM). It was really a blessing that the tires were damaged at that exact moment in that exact place. I don't like to imagine what could have happened if the tires burst in the middle of our trip across NLEX with the car running at 100 km/h.

I was reminded of how blessed I was to be with these people and generally in Pisay for the past four years. I wouldn't have found people like them - intellectuals who talk about science, politics, religion and other important topics over a meal - who I am comfortable to be with. Pisay has allowed my personality to blossom and develop and not be hindered by shame or shyness because I was in a place where I really truly belonged. It saddens me a bit that we're all about to part ways physically but I still hope that the friendships we've sown and tended to will survive the tests of distance and time.

I got a lot more realizations and lessons. Some of them were related to teaching in Pisay and some life questions I rarely ask myself; others were about living in a whole new environment and being possessive of friends; some regarding the beliefs in other faiths, exorcisms and wandering spirits.

It's amazing that although physically, all I brought home were pictures and sea shells, I feel I came home with a lot of ideas, new knowledge and different paradigms by which I could view the world.

It's also a welcome respite to finally be talking about things we don't usually talk about because we had more "important" and pressing matters to attend to. This summer comes only every after a step in the educational ladder. This transition from high school to college allows us to focus no longer on the academics of the past high school or look to much into the future dynamics of college life. Perhaps this freedom from the burden of academic requirements allowed us to be more open about the aspects of our lives we rarely share to other people. This freedom allowed us to focus on the really more important things.

Hahaha. I even brought home three "homeworks" that I will think about and research on. One is about the people-based theory that Sir Mardan and I developed in our conversation. I will be talking more about this in my next post. The two others were from my conversations with Pito. I will not delve into the second but of the third, I realized that sometimes I have only a vague idea of why things are in our faith. I do them sincerely and believe in them as acts of faith but I'm surprised that I don't know by heart the theological explanations regarding them despite the inquisitive and critical thinking training we received in Pisay. It reminded me of the importance of seeking God in everything - in the spiritual, physical and even the mental realms of life.

The joy I got out of the trip was beyond the momentary ecstasy of riding a banana boat at high speeds or trying out the slide or playing an intense acceleration game. It was beyond the immediate satisfaction of travelling to new places and experiencing new things. It was founded on meaning - on the fact that I brought home so much of the things that change very little and that I was with friends I will be with till I can't recognize anyone anymore and with my God.

Fragile

2007-05-22T18:12:00.000-07:00

Watching movies like "28 Weeks Later" or “Spiderman-3” and even series like “Heroes” and “Smallville” reminds me of how fragile human civilization is. The achievements we've done, the mistakes we've committed, the order we've set, all are insignificant in the universal order of things. We are truly but a speck in the infinity of space at a moment in eternal time.

In all those movies, change is indeed constant. Change has defined history and has made it interesting and exciting.

The dawn of men came when the dominant reptiles were wiped out by a single meteor (or fine, maybe not) or by a global winter or something. Hahaha. Point is they were dragged to extinction and the funny thing is we didn’t have to do anything about it.

Tyrants easily changed the course of their nations’ history as much as they changed the world’s. Qin Shihuangdi forged the Chinese Empire. Caesar laid the foundations for the Roman Empire. Xerxes, the Pharaohs, Alexander, Napoleon, and even Hitler all shaped history by instituting change. They used war, conquest and ambition as tools for history to remember them. They immortalized themselves by making sure the changes they made remained.

Other changes involved entire civilizations that impacted the history of the world. South America might be different today if the Aztec, Incan and Mayan civilizations were not destroyed. The collapse of the Roman Empire that had stood for centuries ushered in a new era in history. The fall of the fascist German state and the Russian communist system defined the world as it is today.

When you study history, it’s always defined by the changes that occurred. World War I, World War II, 9/11 – these are the most familiar turning points of history.

There are, of course, the changes that mattered not only in this world but beyond as well. A single bite of an apple brought eternal damnation. A single yet ultimate act of love brought eternal salvation.

From what is shown in the movies, human beings seem to value normality so much that it’s worth dying for. Of course, there are instances when humanity is (hopefully) united in change such as in the fights against AIDS or poverty. But there are battles that we unite against it. In “28 Weeks Later”, the US military fought to control the spread of the Rage virus. In “Spiderman-3”, Spiderman fought the symbiotic alien life form from taking over him. In “Heroes”, they fought to keep a bomb that would change the world from exploding. In “Smallville”, Clark fought to save himself from the scrutiny of the world he is also saving.
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with fighting for normalcy, for keeping things the way they are. The problem emerges when we fight for it for the wrong reasons. They say energy companies discretely fight green technologies to retain their monopolies. They say the old rich of this country fight to keep their monopolies of the agricultural lands and of political influence.

Striving and living for success in the standards of the world is futile simply because these standards are artificial. Society today measures success in grades, diplomas, wealth and influence. They are but temporary social constructs. Success in life must not be based on a fragile society’s standards. We’ve managed to build a world for ourselves and we’ve lived in it for so long that we think we can work to keep ourselves in it.

We should therefore strive for success that will never wane and be forgotten, achievements that change cannot tamper with.

The greatest battles are indeed fought within because these are the battles that truly matter. In these conflicts are decided why we are doing anything that we want to do. Is it merely for ourselves, or for the worldly society, or the eternal God that we should be doing it for?

To rephrase my earlier premise, change is constant only in this world. So we must strive for riches that are beyond this world, success in the realm of eternity. And we’ve already been told how to do it and arrangements have been made for us to do it (that’s what the single ultimate act of love did for us). It’s only a matter of if we will do it, if we will defeat the temptations of the world to keep us in its grips.

Contrary to what Linderman said, true happiness is founded on meaning. True happiness is eternal and not subject to change. A meaningless happiness founded on the now will change in the next moment. But happiness built on an eternity of meaning will last even if a bomb goes off and ends the world.

Something to remember 4

2007-05-20T15:55:00.000-07:00

Teach me to listen, Holy Spirit,
for Your voice -
in busyness and in boredom,
in certainty and in doubt,
in noise and in silence.
Teach me, Lord, to listen. Amen.

- John Veitri, S.J.

Something to remember 3

2007-05-20T08:04:00.001-07:00

God is just so great.

For every disappointment I receive, I get a new blessing in return. It's really more than I deserve, but because God gives them to me, I guess it's really part of His wonderful plan for me.

And because my life is just so full of blessings already, all that He needs to do is remind me of how blessed I really am and of the blessings I may have taken for granted.

It's sad sometimes that I find personal joy in the misery of others because sometimes, it is how my reminders from Him arrive. I would not dare claim I understand why but perhaps its because I can do my share in helping those people, even if I really have no idea what they're going through. Sometimes, comforting words and reassurances go a long way. Prayers go even longer.

God gives us all that we need, and sometimes what we want. If what we want is to allow God's will to happen, then there is no question that we'll get what we want.

The True Story

2007-05-18T05:33:00.000-07:00

Or maybe not. But it paints both a grim and hopeful picture of politics in our town and in the Philippines in general.

Apparently, the people who gathered to support Ricky Sandoval were not hauled in by the mayoralty candidate himself. He didn't even file a formal election protest. People say he had accepted his defeat to incumbent Toby Tiangco and was only fighting for the candidacy of his brother, Alvin, who was running for congress.

The sad part about this is that people didn't go there out of principle and support. Heck, not even all of them are voters of Navotas. They say people who went there came from slum areas around Navotas like Tondo, Malabon and other parts of Manila. The protesters who came there in hopes of receiving free food were rallied by groups who wanted to make money out of the situation.

Akala ko masama na ang mga naghahakot na mga pulitiko na pinapangakuaan ng pera ang mga tao. Sa rally na yun, nagpunta ang mga tao dahil wala na silang makain at pinangakuan sila ng mga taong gusto silang pagkakitaan na papakainin sila ng ipaglalaban nilang kandidato.

The good part is that some politicians, although not exactly law-abiding, are compassionate and sensitive enough to know when the fight is over. The Sandoval camp, after sustaining the crowd overnight, dispersed them by paying each Php 300.00. Not exactly vote buying hehehe. In a sense, the good guy is Sandoval.

This is perhaps a snapshot of the answer to the link between economy and politics. Some of the poorest of our people engage in political activities not because they believe in them but because they are the only venues for them to find sustenance.

But looking at the victory of a priest against the wife of an alleged jueteng lord and an incumbent actor whose dad is a senator shows a different side of politics. Poor people can unite to fight for a cause they believe in, not for short term gratification, but for long term progress and change.

I hope we'll see more of the latter case in the future.

Something new in Navotas

2007-05-15T17:28:00.000-07:00

This is really historical. It has not happened since 1998.

Yesterday, hundreds of supporters of former Congressman and mayoralty candidate Ricky Sandoval gathered in front of the municipal hall of Navotas claiming that there was massive cheating in the counting of the votes. They accuse the teachers of Navotas of siding with incumbent mayor and re-electionist Toby Tiangco. They also blame the mayor for votes that came from dead people. They've set up tents and a stage in front of the municipal hall and they say they'll stay there holding vigil while canvassing continues inside.

Partial and unofficial tallies show Tiangco and many of his partymates are leading.

Again, Navotas has not seen this much political activity since 1998, when Efren Bautista went against long-time mayor of Navotas, Peping Del Rosario. Efren, a candidate who had lost for two consecutive elections against Peping, was seen as a modern David and Goliath battle. But there was an outpour of support for the underdog as he was a welcome break from the decade-long reign of Del Rosario. I remember my dad joining in the motorcades and watching closely at the canvassing of votes. It was a well known fact that Del Rosario was capable of manipulating the results, so the people of Navotas were extra vigilant.

This chapter of Navotas history ended in both a sad and glorious note. At the end of the whole debacle, Efren Bautista won to the jubilation of many citizens of Navotas. However, the Municipal Hall of the now 100-year old municipality was burned down. A few months after his election, the hope of Navotas died of natural causes. Navotas was in mourning.

This was where then-vice mayor Toby Tiangco came into the picture. He was and remains to be a young and dynamic leader who delivers results for Navotas despite his outspoken political affiliation with the opposition led by Erap and FPJ.

In this year's campaign, I'd say, despite Toby being the incumbent, he was the David in this "proxy war" between the opposition and the administration represented by Sandoval. The number of posters, big tarps and billbords (which are technically beyond 2x3 - the prescribed limit for these stuff), and the rallies speak volumes of the formidable machinery of the incumbent Congressman who presents as his main achievement the Navotas Cityhood Bill.

And I'm not sure about how the rest of Navotas feels, but our family is for Tiangco simply because he's been a good mayor in his 9 year reign. And the best part - I think - is that he rarely boasts of them the way Sandoval does. Months before the actual campaign, he posted on almost every post along M. Naval a billboard with his face and he project he had worked for the area - street construction, school construction etc.

The sad part is the two were once partymates in the local Partido Navoteno. For two elections, they were the most formidable ticket that Navotas has seen in the long time. But because Sandoval's three terms in congress had already ended, the politically logical move is go for the top post. Tiangco was only on his second term as an elected mayor.

But my political views aside, I don't see the logic behind the accusations of the Sandoval camp. I've seen the amount of resources the Sandoval camp poured into the campaign so it would be stupid if the same amount was not allocated for poll watching. They claim the teachers read ballots differently especially in areas they claim to be their strong areas. I understand that poll watchers for any candidate are supposed to make sure the ballots are read right.

With regards to dead people voting, our family has seen that first-hand with my lolo (a long-time suppporter of Tiangco) who had died was still in the list even if my mom had informed the COMELEC about his death in the last election. Even my tito and tita who had already immigrated and have been naturalized as American citizens were still part of the list were still in the official list of voters. But I don't think it is within Tiangco's influence to do it. This is only speculation because I have not seen the proof provided by the Sandoval camp. I'll hold on to my judgement until the PPCRV in Navotas issues an official statement.

The funny thing about the vigil they have there is that they've lighted candles on the municipal grounds and they have entertainment on the stage with dancers and variety songs.

This political demonstration is I think within the rights of those hundreds of supporters. I just hope they came there on their own accord just as it was in the 1998 elections and not just brought there with the promise of compensation. The local police has promised to allow the rally as long as they stay within the grounds and remain peaceful. So far, that has been the case.

I hope this will not end with the municipal hall burning down to ashes.

My list

2007-05-13T07:15:00.000-07:00

Sobrang excited na ako magvote. Gusto ko na. hahaha. Kaya I made my own list (which my mom says she will consider using hehehe).

SENATORS
1. Escudero - I'm hoping he runs for president in 2010 because I will really be voting for him. Despite being a product of a political dynasty (His father was I think a senator too), he's certainly got the dynamism to get pass the shadow of his father. He represents the much needed infusion of fresh and young blood into the Senate that does not engage in excessive political bickering and mudslinging. He stands firm on issues and has the charisma to get his point across.
// sa kanya lang ako mageexplain, siya lang talaga ang super gusto ko. haha.
2. Aquino
3. Pangilinan
4. Alan Cayetano
5. Arroyo - could have been number 2 kaso he went to TU.
6. Roco
7. Legarda
8. Lacson
9. Villar

//beyond this line ay yung mga candidates na I don't really like that much pero I'd vote for them to complete my list.
__________________________________________________
10. Pimentel - nakakaasar ang ad niya, hayagang political dynasty
11. Angara - Sci & tech daw ang isa sa mga platforms niya
12. Zubiri - can write laws better than the rest of the remaining candidates
__________________________________________________

So what are my criteria?
1. Well being in the opposition or generally non-administration is a factor. Even if the administration machinery does not work for the senatorial race, it's almost a given that it would take the house and the local elections. Making sure the opposition has a healthy margin (kahit magkapalitan ng sides) to keep set one more check and balance to total administration control of the entire government.
2. They have to show integrity on being firm on the issues. Walang problema magpalit ng sides basta issue-driven. I think the 9 candidates have that integrity.
3. They must be able to show the qualities of a true legislator - someone who looks at the issues and can give new and efficient solutions to them and most importantly, can translate them in actual law. Parang programming yan (di ba Clar?), madaling magsabi ng solution, pero mahirap itransform into a working code given all the constraints and complexities. I wouldn't expect that kind of ability from someone who started with being a doctor, a member of the executive branch or an actor - especially kung ang credentials na pinapakita nila ay somewhat unrelated sa quality na toh.
4. They must at least seem to not be interested in corrupt practices. You can never really know pero may ibang candidates talaga na mas may propensity than most. One indicator na ginagamit ng tatay ko is their wealth. If they're rich, they'll less likely steal from government. I'm not really sure kung accurate toh. I guess ang only way is really looking into issues past and future. Mahirap eto talaga idetermine.

Basically, that's it. haha.

Sobra pala ang trust na binibigay sa voters. Ang tanging qualifications lang ng isang senator ay:
1. natural born citizen
2. at least 35 years of age
3. literate
4. registered voter
5. resident of the Philippines for not less than two years

Yun lang o. The rest is up to the conscience of the voter to choose what is for the best of the nation. I hope there will come a time when that trust will no longer be misplaced.

May command votes kaya silang makukuha sa pagendorse ko sa kanila? bwahahaha.
__________________________________________________
EXTRA:
Kakakausap lang sa akin ni Cecile. Sabi raw ng ninang niya, wala raw nagawa si Chiz para sa constituents niya. Di ko alam pero ang usual translation kasi ng nagawa ay mga daang natapos o schools na nabuo (yun ang credentials na pinapakita ng congressman running for mayor dito sa amin).

Here's my opinion on this: Ang isang congressman ay representative ng isang district sa isang national assembly. So ang trabaho niya, magrepresent sa district na yun sa pagbuo ng mga batas for the nation. By definition, ang legislator ay gumagawa lang ng batas at ang representative ay nagmamake sure lang na ang mga batas na yun ay makakatulong din para sa constituents niya.

So kung sa legislative record na lang din, 9 years na siyang congressman at andami niya nang naipropose na national bills. I know senators na ang mga bills lang na naiffile ay pagbabago ng pangalan ng mga streets. Check out his site: www.chizescudero.com.

Dun siguro sa pagpapagawa ng mga roads at schools, dun pumapasok ang pork barrel. I don't really know, di naman ako taga sorsogon pero baka kasi dahil hindi siya administration, hindi nairerelease sa kanya ang pork barrel funds niya. Di ko alam ah. It happens pero speculation lang toh.

Tapos why do I like Chiz so much? Because he has so much potential. Technically bata pa siya sa politics pero kakikitaan mo na ng leadership qualities. The opposition is composed of true opposition by issue, mga dismayadong dating administration, mga maiingay at grand-standing na congressman at mga leftists. His minority leadership showed his leadership potential. Isipin mo, he was able to unite all these different opposition groups into one solid bloc capable of making the administration tremble in fear of an impending impeachment. If one can unite these totally different people, he has the potential of uniting the Filipino people! hahaha.

Tapos may integrity, credibility, charisma and ability pa to match. Sana talaga magpresidente na siya. hahaha.

Why WE should care

2007-05-13T06:59:00.000-07:00

The usual TV battle is this: CNN/News programs and science channels vs Karl's cartoons and sometimes vs Mom's soap operas and showbiz talk shows. Although these battles are quite common in households with TV and cable, the channels that are fought for do not usually include my choices hehe. Ang nerd noh? But I don’t know. We don’t really have a newspaper subscription so I can only read it once a week (at my lola’s) so I’d have to settle with news programs on TV.

I am used to watching World News on CNN at least once a day (kapag may cable kami hehe), TV Patrol everyday, listening to DZMM on the car and staying tuned especially in special events like the televised impeachment trials, the canvassing of votes, the congressional hearings and debates etc. etc.

I guess this peculiarity can be explained by my “obsession” in following the real life soap operas of politics here in the Philippines and the world in general. I don’t know. As much as my mom always wants to catch how Jackie cries over Ellie or Celine argues with JB, I always want to be in-the-know with the latest here and around the world. Siguro more than my insatiable curiosity (I always want to be the first to know – kaya siguro nagengjourn), I feel I am part of history when I witness history made through the lens of the cameras, the microphones and the eyes of the reporters.

I used to tell my parents I was watching for bonus points in Social Science (para payagan during weekdays :P) and well it was true when I was in grade school. But when I entered a school run by the government, it was more of knowing the issues that could very well determine if I would keep my four-year scholarship in PSHS (imagine kung nagkacoup tapos ang unang nangyari pala pinatanggal nila ang Pisay – saying sa pera. Scary. Haha). But I read this article written by Randy David in the Inquirer: <http://opinion.inquirer.net/inquireropinion/columns/view_article.php?article_id=63092>
And it gave me a better reason to care.

And the part that struck me is this:

“A building or structure collapses when its pillars and trusses fold into one another, making them unable to perform their support function. Strong societies, like strong buildings, distribute their weight efficiently among a number of differentiated support systems. When one of these systems fails, the framework may be compromised, but chances are it will remain standing, allowing time to repair the broken part.

This is not what happens when a society’s stability is made to depend almost entirely on a single dominant system—such as the political system, in our case. The crisis of Philippine politics has spread across the whole social system, dangerously dragging down every institution in its path.”

Nakakalungkot, but it’s true. Politics is slowly spreading its roots on our entire way of life. Education, business, the legal system, religion and society in general is slowly being engulfed in the mire of politics. And with the road Philippine politics is treading – a road to perdition and collapse, it could very well be bringing all of us with it.

This is why we should care: because our way of life hangs in the balance.

Whenever we talk about politics in our family, it always ends with “wag na nga, nakakasawa na e”. The trend is because of the constant political bickering with little good results for the people, the citizenry is growing indifferent to politics. But, though this is true, we still give that occasional bribe to the mayor or congressman to expedite our business permits etc etc. This “I don’t care” attitude is almost equivalent to condoning the flaws of the system.
This is why we should care: because not caring means we are allowing the cancer of politics to grow and spread

Most people my age don’t even want to know anything about the elections simply because we still can’t vote. Sayang lang nga naman sa oras. It wouldn’t matter if we know about the candidates and decide who are the best for our country simply because in the end, it won’t matter, we can’t vote for them.

But actually it would matter. Political maturity does not happen overnight. Maturity comes with experience and what experience will we get from just watching Heroes or One Tree Hill and turning off the TV when we see the shows for voters’ education?

In the next elections come May 2010, we will be voting for the next president of the Philippines. And theoretically, our generation has the most power and a lot more at stake. I’m sure you remember that in the Philippines, the next generation is always larger than the previous one by an exponent. And if everyone in our generation and the youth would vote, we would by far have more power in number compared to the adults. Grabe, our generation could really change the nation if every single one of us votes.

Pero siyempre, the cliché statement “With great power comes great responsibility” still applies. And it is our responsibility to vote for the good of our nation. Political maturity is key in getting past the dirty tricks and deception that has characterized Philippine politics. It is exactly how we might hope to clean the system – by showing them guns, goons and gold don’t work with us. Therefore, it is our responsibility to make sure we are mature enough by 2010. It is not something we can cram like any other test. It requires us to take interest in what is happening in our country, knowing the issues, and the personalities involved in those issues.

So tomorrow, take part in guarding the votes. Watch the news, be involved, get interested, START CARING.

This is why WE the youth should start caring: because if we don’t, our future will be sucked into the black hole of dirty politics.

Senseless na naman?

2007-05-10T21:55:00.000-07:00

Pero dahil di ko pa matapos ung next post ko (sana bago ung deadline hahaha), e I will indulge in more senseless blog "games". Got tagged by cheska.

Each player of this games starts with 6 weird things about you. People who get tagged need to write a blog of their own 6 weird things as well as state the rule clearly. In the end, you need to choose 6 people to be tagged and list their names. Don’t forget to leave a comment that says you are tagged in their comments and tell them to read your blog.

1. Ang kryptonite ko ay suka. You know, ung vinegar, acetic acid, CH3COOH. I don't really know why. I'm not allergic to it as in it can cause inflammation etc etc pero ayaw ko talaga. I used to throw up when I smell it and would even eat away from the table kapag merong kumakain with suka. Siguro psychological ang "problem" in nature = sira ang ulo ko. hahahaha. pero yun talaga. I've even promised myself when I was young to rid the world of vinegar. hahaha.

2. I also do not use any of the usual sauces like ketshup, mustard, mayonnaise. Baka dahil may suka din sila hahaha (check the ketshup label next time) pero ayaw ko rin talaga. Di ko na kinakain kapag nalagyan na ng any of the three sauces.

3. Di rin po ako kumakain ng tinapay except certain variations such as pizza, cakes, garlic bread and unleavened bread. Sabi ko sa inyo may psychiatric problem ako hahaha.

4. Hindi rin ako nagsusuot (masyado ng sando) if I had the choice. Nung grade school kasi we were required to wear them pang ilalim ng polo so no choice pero when I got the option of t-shirts sa pisay, yun na talaga. Pambahay, panlakad lahat may sleeves. hahaha. Lahat ata from 1-4 nadevelop dahil sa paulit-ulit na hindi paggawa nung bata ako. astig pala ng nagagawa ng mga (hindi) natututunan during the formative years.

5. Noon (or sometimes pag di ko napapansin) kinakagat ko ung corners ng mga bimpo or panyo ko. I don't know why pero parang ang sarap kasi unlike chewing gum, less likely na makakagat mo yung dila mo while chewing on them. hahaha.

6. Di ko alam kung napansin niyo na pero I have this habit of pressing my hand against my ear. Actually ang point nun ilapit ung ear lobes ko so skin. Malamig kasi e. Something to do ata with konti lang ung blood vessels sa ear lobe at manipis kaya mabilis kumabit ung outside temperature. So pag malamig hinahawakan ko, pag mainit, un ung umiinit lalo. Nanghahawak din ako ng ear lobes ng ibang tao para makuha ko ung lamig. hehehehe.

So. I tag Clar, Ray2, Fatima, Andrew, Jane, Pito.

Post hoc?

2007-05-09T05:22:00.000-07:00

Usually natatawa ako sa mga ganitong klaseng mga survey-surveyan. They claim that they could measure accurately how ________ (insert adjective) you are. But in fact, wala lang, walang basis walang halaga at walang kwenta. Pero sige, for the fun of it (masaya minsan gumawa ng senseless stuff hahaha) and to prove how inaccurate this survey is (and to veer away from the serious stuff for a change), I'll do it - Clar and Ray2!

I am 9% girly. (and I doubt if this is an acceptable conclusion - read on)

Take this quiz and find out how girly you are. (GUYS TOO) Put x's beside each thing that's true. Each x that you put is one percent. Have fun!!

[ ] My fingernails/toenails are almost always done. // wala nang CAT
[ ] During the summer the only shoes i wear are flip flops //ano yun?
[ ] My favorite toys as a child were barbies
[ ] My favorite colour is pink or purple
[ ] I did Gymnastics.
[ ] I love skirts.
[ ] Hollister is one of my favorite places to shop
[ ] Tight jeans are the only jeans i'll wear.
[ ] I love chocolate
[x] I've never had a real job. // real job != underemployment; working under-age// so lalaki lang pala ang nagkakareal job? great. haha.
TOTAL: 1

[ ] My hair is almost always straightened
[ ] I have at least 8 myspace pictures
[ ] I usually go shopping once a week
[x] I love to hang out at the mall with friends // e san pa ba? dun lang ako pinapayagan e
[] I have a real diamond ring or diamond necklace or earings.
[ ] I've gone to a tanning salon.
[ ] I've gone to the beach to tan.
[ ] I have at least 10 pairs of shoes.
[ ] I watch either the OC or Laguna Beach.
[ ] I change my icon weekly.
[ ] I wear a shower cap.
TOTAL: 1

[x] I dont shop at Hot Topic. // ano yun?
[ ] My cell phone might as well become a part of me.
[ ] I wear mascara everyday.
[ ] I've been or am on a diet.
[ ] Bathing suits are adorable.
[ ] I dont know the difference between a sheep and a goat. // so lalaki lang din may alam nun?
[ ] Big sunglasses are hott.
[ ] I have gotten my nails done before.
[ ] MTV is one of my favorite channels. // try cnn or national geographic
TOTAL: 1

[ ] All I want to do at sleepovers is talk about boys!
[ ] I love to have girls do my hair.
[ ] I give and recieve hugs from all my friends
[ ] I hate bugs.
[x] Carnivals are so fun! // included naman ang fair at theme park dito di ba?
[ ] Summer is THE best season.
[ ] My swimsuit has 2 pieces
[ ] I'm waiting for my knight in shining armor.
[ ] Musicians are so hot.
[ ] You write me a poem and tell me I'm beautiful and I'm all yours.
TOTAL: 1

[X] I am self-conscious. // it is a fact that self-consciousness is a trait of almost every teenager
[ ] I cry often.
[ ] My car smells like vanilla or cherry.
[x] My dishes get washed more than once a week. //anong "un-manly" dun?
[ ] I dont do sports.
[ ] I HATE to run.
[ ] I squeal when I am surprised or angry.
[ ] I eat dried fruit as a snack.
[ ] I love romance novels.
[ ] Drew Barrymore is so cute.
TOTAL: 2

[ ] I dance a lot.// don't even know how to
[ ] usually spend an hour or over to get ready to leave my house.
[ ] I only have like 5 billion hair products.
[ ] I love to get dressed up.
[ ] Every part of my outfit needs to match.
[ ] I talk on the phone at least once a day to my friends.
[ ] I would love to have a photo shoot.
[ ] I apply lip stuff 50 times a day.
[ ] I wish I were a model.
TOTAL: 0

[ ] I wish I could meet Paris Hilton.
[ ] I have been something that was semi.
[ ] I own Uggs.
[ ] Hip Hop is the best music.
[ ] I pop my collar.
[ ] I like to be the center of attention.
[ ] Guys with Mohawks are crazy.
[ ] Horses are beautiful.
[ ] I'd rather not pay attention in school. // quite the opposite :p
[ ] Cats are adorable.
TOTAL: 0

[ ] I write my own music // i wish
[x] I would love to visit Hawaii. // and travel in general even though i really don't have the resources to do it
[ ] Valentine's day is so cute!
[ ] White is better than black.
[ ] I wouldn't be caught dead in all black.
[ ] My closet is STOCK FULL of clothes.
[ ] Hate the grunge look.
[ ] I love to read magazines.
TOTAL: 1

[ ] I love to gossip. //current events ang mas tama :p
[ ] I had Lisa Frank folders/posters/notebooks as a kid.
[ ] I love Celine Dion.
[ ] My bubble baths are 1-2hrs long.
[ ] My wedding only needs a groom because it's already planned.
[ ] My friends and I are in a strict group. We mostly only hang out with each other.
[ ] I like little kids.
[ ] Diet drinks are the best.
[ ] I'm all about being vegetarian.
[ ] I refuse to eat at McDonalds.
TOTAL: 0

[ ] I check my myspace everyday. // don't even have one
[x] I love life! // so this is supposed to be exclusive to girls?
[ ] I have a lot of jewlery!
[ ] My screen name(s) have x's in them.
[ ] Either one of my myspace names has/had "<3"'s
[x] I would never want to be the opposite sex. // this is just stupid
[ ] It's not what he/she said it's the way he/she said it.
[ ] I have more than 3 pillows on my bed.
TOTAL: 2

Now add up all the total points and put "I am __% girly" for the subject if you steal or get tagged.

ok. To further prove the inaccuracy of this survey, I tag Ben and Andrew.

Not in the Philippines

2007-05-06T15:45:00.000-07:00

Nicholas Sarcozy, a member of the Conservative party (also the party of his predecessor, Jacques Chirac) and a vocal (but critical) supporter of the United States, won the French Presidency over Segolene Royal of the Socialist party.

What caught my attention was this..

"His socialist opponent, Segolene Royal, conceded defeat for her hopes of becoming France's first woman president. With nearly 70 percent of ballots counted, Sarkozy had just over 53 percent of the vote, according to the Interior Ministry. "

Funny na that never happens in the Philippines. Almost all politicians think they're winners. Kaya nga andaming nagtatawag ng dayaan e. There's nothing wrong with it. I guess it's not just the politician but the system - if it was clean, honest and fair enough (nothing can really be perfect) I guess cheating will not even be in the minds of the people.

Another thing..

"Voter turnout was projected at 85 percent — a level not seen in 40 years — thanks to the dynamism of both candidates and the high stakes for a nation losing global clout to neighbors Britain and German and even developing countries like China and India."

Grabe. Kelan kaya mangyayari toh. When people are compelled to vote because of the candidates' charisma, competence and will for change and not money and popularity. And when will voters vote because there is a lot at stake for the country (which incidentally is the case for the upcoming elections - there are very high stakes).

This is a challenge for the Filipino people. There's no need to imitate the system (because it won't work). The power to change is in each. Unfortunately, it will only work if we 'let our powers combine' (parang captain planet noh! hahahahha).

Something to remember 2

2007-05-06T15:32:00.000-07:00

John 13: 34 -35

"I give you a new commandmen: love one another. As I have loved you, so also should you love one another. This is how all will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for another."

Funny, kakabasa ko lang nung comment ni Ate Frances tapos I heard this in mass. hahaha.

It always comes down to love. So love can definitely not suck. Because if it did, kawawa naman tayo, God wouldn't save us and we wouldn't be known as His disciples. Love is the mark of a true follower of Christ. So love rocks! hahahaha.

Kaso, this love that He asks of us is more than the crush type love or romantic love (if you can even call it 'love'). He asks us to love others as much as He loved us. How much did He love us? He gave up His life on the cross to save us from spiritual death. Can we give that same love to others? I would guess so. hahaha. He expects from us something that we can really do.

But wait, there's more! hahaha.

John 14: 26

"The Advocate, the holy Spirit that the Father will send in my name -- he will teach you everything and remind you of all that I told you."

Astig, may Tutor pa tayo. :D

Something to remember 1

2007-05-03T06:23:00.000-07:00

John 14:9

"Jesus said to him, "Have I been with you for so long a time and you still do not know me, Philip? Whoever has seen me has seen the Father. How can you say, "Show us the Father?""

Any true relationship is not measured by the time it has lasted but by how much each person knows about the other. Of course, our relationship with God is no exception.

God knows us completely as Creator, Redeemer and Sustainer. Of course, human as we are, we are bound not to be at that same level. However, because we love God, we should try to seek as much knowledge of Him as possible. And memorizing novenas, prayer booklets and song books would not do the trick. Seek Him always everywhere and in every one.

Thank you Lord for the wonderful homily that made me realize this. :D

Corollary to The Day After Tomorrow

2007-04-30T09:13:00.000-07:00

Nakalimutan ko pala toh.

My mom was watching Miss Earth - Philippines and during the final round, the five remaining candidates were asked this question:

"How will you explain global warming to a little earth angel?"

And their answers were just frustrating. They're supposed to be the protectors of the environment and they didn't even know what they were talking about. Any EnviSci student of Ma'am Andaya would have laughed at their answers. hahaha. Not everyone are Pisay graduates, but hey, you're joining a pageant about the environment, so you should do your homework.

I am not really sure what significance a beauty pageant has in the cause to save the Earth. People look at them not for the cause they fight for but for their looks and charm. The pageant itself and the candidates do not seem to live up to the advocacy of Earth protection - given the resources spent to make such an event happen. I'm only judging from my limited exposure to the activities of Miss Earth. I guess it helps the cause but there's a lot more they can do.

The Day After Tomorrow

2007-04-30T07:39:00.000-07:00

I was browsing through the PDI website when I found this article:

(http://newsinfo.inquirer.net/inquirerheadlines/metro/view_article.php?article_id=63180)

Here is the part that got my attention:

"Rean Tirol, WWF-Philippines’ climate change manager, said at a news conference on Thursday that a rise in local sea levels could inundate half of Metro Manila’s coastal town of Navotas and submerge entire islands in the archipelago."

Can the future just get any grimmer? Corrupted politics, widespread poverty, immorality and my hometown becoming the Atlantis of the Philippines. I'm a young 17-year old working and studying really hard to earn for myself a brighter future and all I will be getting is this.

I recently watched "An Inconvinient Truth" and it made me realize that the things we are doing to our planet is not going to haunt my great grandchilren or my 10th generation descendants - it's going to haunt me and my children. Al Gore claims the effects of global warming will be felt in less than 50 years and I believe him. The effects he's talking about is Manhattan under the sea and millions of people becoming refugees because their homes will be submerged. We are actually starting to feel the effects - subtle climate changes, stronger and more frequent typhoons. The list goes on.

It also made me realize that well, from how nature works, we're going to be the only species who'll feel the pain and suffering because we're the only ones how know what's about the come and we're the ones who made it happen. Humanity will take the highest toll simply because although we're great at adapting (we've inhabited virtually every corner of the planet possible), we've gone to great lengths to transform the world to our liking and we've succeeded. I guess global warming is nature's way of saying that no, that shouldn't be so. God made us stewards not masters of this world. Our habitats are supposed to be part of the environment, much like an ant can live in a tree that termites and birds can also inhabit, not separate from it. We've turned the tables around - making the environment a part of our habitat. And in the process, we are gradually shattering the fragile conditions that allows the Earth to sustain life.

And the last thing I've realized is how powerless individuals, families or even nations are to avert this threat. Unless we get a superhero to suck two degrees celsius worth of heat out of the planet and most of the carbon dioxide we've emitted, we're bound to have cities becoming marine parks in the future. Even if we implement drastic changes, the damage has already been done and the worst part is apparently we - Filipinos living in a low-lying archipelagic country - will be the first to feel it.

Whenever I watch those apocalyptic-type movies which involves water rushing in to submerge whole nations, I wonder how we Filipinos will cope up. For instance, in "Deep Impact", the government builds this huge facility to safeguard the prominent people who will lead the survivors of the disaster. What will our government do? We can't even modernize our weather prediction equipment.

The painful thing about this predicament is that we are made to suffer for the mistakes we did very little to commit. The major polluters are the ones most likely to survive the coming catastrophes. A big chunk of the third-world is simply going to be wiped away from existence. My generation will be forced to carry a burden getting heavier by the day.

Minsan lang ako magrant pero this is something worth ranting about. Bakit kelangang kami ang magdusa?

The fact is we can't solve this problem fast enough to save our future from being ruined. But we can hope that this burden will no longer be carried by the next generation if we act on it now. In the movie, the success of the world to protect the ozone layer was mentioned. I believe humans are the most adept at surviving and I guess the problem lies in that humanity is not taking the problem too seriously. So that's what needs to be done. Heed the warning and starting doing our part.

It was revealed that very few of the countries that signed the Kyoto protocol are going to succeed in reaching the goals set regarding the reduction of carbon emmissions and I doubt the Philippines is going to be one of them. We can all do our part, yes, in our own little way - walking instead of driving, conserving energy etc. But the drastic measures that need to be done to prevent the disasters coming our way like half of Navotas becoming part of Manila Bay are just too expensive and well, inconvinient for any one individual to commit to. This battle is a hard one because it will be a costly one. And that is the most frustrating part about this whole global warming issue.

But at least the wheels of change are starting to move to this direction. Green technologies are gaining popularity and much needed financial support. Political will is being exercised to support them. And people are one by one waking to the idea of a different world if the path we are traversing is not changed. I still hope it will move fast enough to keep Navotas on the map.

Sometimes I envision Pisay to be the hope in this struggle - that one day a group of Pisay graduates would find a revolutionary solution to end global warming. My hopes are never higher with so much more at stake.

Soon enough, the mantle of leadership will fall on our shoulders. It will be soon up to us to face this crisis. In LOTR:FOTR, Frodo tells Gandalf he wishes the ring had not come to him, that none of the things they had experienced had happened. The wise wizard replies: "So do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us." Shall we also ignore this problem just as they have or shall we decide to carry this ring to its end?

Summer Job

2007-04-27T20:07:00.000-07:00

I've been working for this '94 Pisay graduate this past few days (thanks Cheska for bringing me on board :D). Other than the fact na we're being paid, the type of work I'm doing is something I really like. Haha. Essays, research papers. saya! Plus the topics are very interesting. Siguro the worst part of everything is the deadline (which I've actually broken twice).

The first paper I was asked to write was about Illegal Immigration in the US. Siguro the best thing I realized is that buti na lang the Philippines is an archipelago surrounded by large bodies of water and that we're an ocean away from the US or else we might see millions of Filipinos crossing the border to the US. As it is, (one option lang pede, visa overstaying) the Philippines is one of the top countries wtih visa holders who become illegal immigrants because they stay in the US indefinitely beyond the terms of their visa. Grabe pala. Thousands of Mexians cross the border everyday and hundreds die because of the harsh conditions they have to face to get across. Nakakaawa pero it's a fact of life there. Hindi pa nga yung mga super duper poor ung lumilipat e, un pang mga may trabaho naman at may pamilya. Sad na we see the same thing here in the Philippines. It's the middle class that's leaving this country. And a country without a vibrant middle class is a country doomed to economic collapse.

The second paper I got was about the diseases of famous rulers. Ang saya gawin nito! hahaha. Grabe pala. Sickness can really shape the fate of a nation. The third Roman Emperor, Caligula, had either epilepsy, encephalitis or meningitis seven months from the beginning of his rule and it turned him from a benevolent and compassionate leader to a cruel, egoistic and insane tyrannt who thought himself to be a living god! Ivan the Terrible was one of the greatest rulers of Russia who brought expansion and reform to the empire but his reign came crashing down because he caught syphilis and took mercury as the "treatment" aggravating his mental instability. Queen Victoria holds the record as the British monarch with the longest reign. It was in her era that the Industrial Revolution came to its zenith and the British Empire included India, South Africa, Canada, Australia and New Zealand making it the foremost Global Power. But her grim legacy was the hemophilia gene she passed on to her children who later on married several members of other royal families in Europe. The defective gene penetrated the Spanish, German and Russian imperial families. Astig na the gene could have entered the British royal family if Alix, a granddaugther of Victoria, had chosen to marry a prince fo Britain instead of the Czar of Russia. Hemophilia was expressed in the only son and heir to the throne of Russia, Alexis. His parents focused so much on his ailment that they lost touch of their subjects, allowed a healer to gain influence in the Kremlin and caused the deterioration and final collapse of the centuries-old Russian Empire because of the Russian Revolution. Galing talaga nito. One single mutated gene transformed Russia from an ancient empire to the communist super power it later became! Ano kaya nangyari kung sa Britain pumasok ang gene at hindi sa Russia? Magkakarevolution pa kaya? Ang galing di ba?

So yun. We're currently working on another project. Hopefully, we don't break the deadline again. hehehe.

Pneumonia

2007-04-24T04:01:00.000-07:00

Pneumonia is the condition wherein alveoli are inflammed and filled with fluid. It may be caused be a variety of pathogens including viruses, fungi, parasites and bacteria. Complications include septic shock resulting from spreading of the pathogens from the infected lung through the bloodstream to virtually anywhere in the body.

Astig ng wikipedia noh. All you need to know. hahaha.
My brother (Kevin) has had this illness for about 3-4 days now and he's been admitted to the hospital in the hopes of expediting his recovery. It all started with a boil (indicating his weakened resistance) and now this.

When they discovered that he had it (with a chest X-ray), I was a bit surprised. I haven't heard anyone I know with this condition. I suppose a normal body resistance is sufficient to fight the many pathogens that cause this disease. We're still trying to figure out why his immune system weakened.

I'm posting this here because I know he needs all the prayers he can get. I am confident God the super-healer will cure Him in His own time. Maganda din na kinakatok Siya often para dun. hehe.

UPDATE:
My brother is out of the hospital and back here sa bahay. Thank God! Ambilis! Compared to the two weeks of Ate Frances' Dad, my brother only had to stay for 3 days.

Buti na lang his condition was detected early on. Only less than 1/4 of the lung cavity was affected and filled up with fluid. I pressume the cause of the pneumonia was bacterial since well, the medication prescribed were extremely powerful (and expensive) antibiotics. Imagine you could buy a pocketbook with every capsule he took. hahaha.

So he's back and he's feeling a lot better. There is still some fluid in his lungs which causes him to cough a lot. But my parents say continuous medication would clear the fluid out.

Thank you for all the prayers. :D My parents forbid my brother to tell his friends that he was in the hospital so as to keep them from visiting him since his disease was infectious. Haha. Pero siyempre ako pinost ko pa sa blog. hahaha.

Ayun. Thank God ambilis Niya magpagaling. :D

Rebolusyon ng Pag-asa!

2007-04-21T05:46:00.000-07:00

I have so much to say about my first ever ILC, I don't know if anyone would stand reading the whole entry. Pero what the heck, I made the blog to keep my thoughts so I'll try to stick as much of them here.

The 14th International Leaders' Conference of the CFC- Youth for Christ was really a blast! God told me a lot of things through this event so it has earned the distinction of being among my most unforgettable experiences.

My being there was really a miracle for me. The first time I asked permission from my parents, I got a resounding no with the “pag tanda mo maiintindihan mo na” argument to match. It would have come to no surprise if it was some other activity but I had hoped that the nature of this event would elicit a different response. I was really shocked and hurt. I was serious about my commitment to God through YFC and coming there was a part of it. So I prayed and asked that He enlighten my parents to allow me to go there OR that He enlighten me that I may understand why I wasn't allowed to go. God is just so great He gave me both. OR na nga ginawa pang AND. Hahaha.

With the bleak hope of ever coming to Naga, I tried to think why God wasn’t going to bring me there. I knew for sure that if I was doing His will, nothing can stop me from making it happen. So either this statement wasn’t true or I wasn’t doing His will. And He made me realize that my intentions for coming to the event weren’t exactly as pure as I claimed they were. That time, I was excited at the thought of spending three days away to a place I’ve never been before. Dream ko talaga to travel and this was one chance I couldn’t pass plus the fact that I’ll be with my friends. Now if I really had His will in mind, I wouldn’t have these thoughts. If I really wanted to do service to Him, Naga wasn’t the only place I could do that. So in the end, I accepted the fact that maybe He didn’t really want me there and that if He did, He’d just carry me and bring me there (not in the literal sense of course :p). I didn’t lose hope so I tried to make my case on the safety of the trip etc. (imagine in over 5 years, two incidents pa lang! Mas marami pa sa EDSA ata e) but I knew if I still wasn’t allowed in the end I knew it was just God’s will.

And buti na lang He let me through that “purification stage”, so I was ready for what happened next. Hahaha. I can’t exactly attribute it to any one thing I did or circumstance that came to pass but it was God working to bring me to my very first ILC. One day they told me to drop the subject, the next they told me ok we’ll let you go. Iba talaga magwork si God. Hahaha. So that’s how this whole thing started.

So we rode a bus to Naga with the best company. haha. Clar, Fatima, Greggy, Dani, Nico, Karizz, Ben, Reynard, Ed, Dane, Ate Arielle, Kuya Joseph, Christmas and Ivy and later on Jef (who came from Bataan). Check out how vain everyone was (http://robroque.multiply.com/) 11 hour long drive. Hot Bicol Sun. Wonderful site – Metro Naga Sports Complex. House 300 m away from the site. Tricycle. Jeep to Downtown Naga. Pili shopping spree. Andami-dami-dami-daming nangyari. :D (Too many to recount accurately! :P)

The session I found most interesting was the second one where we were divided by gender. I found it surprising and a bit shocking. I’ve been in co-ed schools all my life so I’ve grown used to the idea that women can be leaders and even take over traditionally male roles. The point of the session was to remind us of our roles as men and future fathers and heads of families and communities. Three problems were pointed out to be the fault of men: (1) corruption (2) poverty (3) crime. Most politicians are men and most of them are corrupt. Most men as fathers provide for their families. Most criminals are men. The roots of these problems are that men take too many shortcuts (corruption is a very short route to prosperity), men are too timid to seize opportunities (poverty at the microscopic level is due to individuals being unable to earn) and men fail to dream (when all dreams fail, they resort to crime to solve the problem). And of course the solution to these is that men must learn to take the long, hard road to success, to seize all opportunities and dream big. I was really surprised when the speaker said, “matakot na kayo kapag mga babae na ang namumuno”. Sounds sexist if you take it as is, but if it’s in context, it has sense. The role of men is to provide and care for women which is why leadership must be placed on the shoulders of men (this is the case in YFC and other CFC organizations). Though it really sounds sexist, it’s NOT because the point of it all is that women are to be taken care of and not stripped of purpose and work. It may seem odd that women empowerment movement is the trend in the world today but when you look back, history says most women were oppressed and their best interests were not pursued.

Andami-dami-dami ding worship! It’s just amazing that at one moment everyone is minding their own business even while people are speaking in front but when worship starts, everyone is focused on praising God. It’s even more amazing that 8,500 youth would come together to praise God!!! Check out videos by Dani (http://chudawi.multiply.com)

The open-field mass was also great. The way the gospel was read was so clear that one could imagine the scene unfolding as it is read (story of Thomas and how Jesus erased his doubts). A bishop gave the homily and the point was a revolution of hope is incomplete if it is not founded on a revolution of faith and that a revolution of love will happen soon after. You can hope for nothing if you do not put faith in God and love is hope in action. Amazing din yung communion part. Ganun pala siguro noong feeding of the five thousand. Hahaha.

Grabe. May concerts pa at the end of the two nights. Spongecola sponsored by Globe and Rocksteddy sponsored by Smart. These two companies were major sponsors of the event. I don’t have anything against having sponsors for an event like this. The venue looked great and the sounds and lights were even better and these couldn’t have been possible without their support. Ganda nga tignan na these two rival corporations are working together in a cause like this. But I think these concerts were distractions and a waste of money. Hehe. The funds could have been used to build around eight houses at their respective GK sites (both companies have sponsored GK villages).

I learned a lot (practical and spiritual) because of this trip. But perhaps the most important thing He made me realize was that service to Him begins now and not when you’re financially stable. I remember my interview for the Star Scholarship, they asked me what I will be doing 10 years from now. I answered I imagine myself working and earning enough to satisfy my family and serve others. In choosing between UP and Ateneo, service was a criterion. There is no question that I want to serve. However, I realized I wanted it to be convenient for myself and service is not about convenience. That is why I hope before this summer ends, I’ll finally be able to serve in a GK community. (Clar ayusin mo ha. :p) Working full-time for YFC has also crossed my mind. Hahaha.

The revolution of hope is about showing the world why we are the “pag-asa ng bayan” NOW and working so that passing this torch of being the hope of the nation to the next “kabataan” would no longer be a necessity. God has given our generation so many tools, so many gifts, the only thing that we need is our resolve to join this glorious revolution – for the glory of our country and God.

The ILC, this year, I think was giving the message that all youth can be heroes, that we can make a difference not tomorrow but today. (Nakakatawa na ung videos sa simula nung sessions tried to mimic “Heroes” parehong-pareho pa ng font! :D) God is raising an army of heroes not slaves for He has made us to be great.

There were a lot of interesting paintings around the site but the most engaging was the one which shows REVOLUTION with EVOL inverted to LOVE. (ung picture ko ngayon sa ym) Any true and noble revolution must have love at the center – love for the cause you are fighting for. In our revolution, it is our love for our nation and our God that unites us, that keeps us noble and true to our cause.

I know I have this love. I am ready for the revolution. Are you?

Congratulations!

2007-04-18T09:45:00.000-07:00

Almost forgot to post this.

Congrats kay Dane for making it into Intarmed. :D

I know how much she wants to get in and God really loves Dane and His plan for Him seems to be for her to become a doctor so yehey, nothing can stop it. :D

I am looking forward to discounted medical care from you and my many other friends that will become doctors in 7 years (last count ko 17). hahaha. Sana naman iba-iba kayo ng specialization para you can start a hospital. hahaha. Hmmmmm. Pede rin palang Batch Hospital noh. Chemists can provide the drugs, engineers sa construction, compsci sa database and networking stuff and me at amf sa finances at marami pang iba. Galing! hahaha.

Congrats to you and to everyone who made it to Intarmed. :D

The Struggle

2007-04-18T08:47:00.000-07:00

Wahoo. I just finished working on the organization list for the whole batch. Grabe. I never imagined typing this much would be hard! VERY VERY HARD! Harder than studying for an Econ Test!

I am fully aware that this is part of my job as documentation committee member for the yearbook and I do not really regret being a member of that committee but I tried to analyze what brought me to this very difficult situation of having to cram (yes, cramming for a deadline I set myself in the middle of the summer vacation!) whereas I could have easily divided the work the past few weeks where all I did was sleep and read and play (Holy Week not included :p)

I realized it would be more beneficial for me if I looked back beyond the past weeks of summer and focus on the whole 4-year Pisay experience. I know that Pisay has changed me a lot but I haven't really given thought to what exactly it has changed in me. This will take a long time to finish but it's an endeavor worth taking. I need to know myself well before I enter the confusing realities of college life.

So far, I have admitted to myself that I've become someone who works well under pressure to someone who works ONLY under pressure; that I've turned from someone who plans and sticks to that plan to someone who is flexible with its implementation or sometimes outright reactionary; that I've changed from being a great preparation person who makes sure nothing will go wrong to being a great on-the-spot problem solver. Extreme changes don't you think?

Back in grade school, cramming was not even part of my vocabulary. The teacher gives us a project one day, I finish it the next day with a perfect score and a lot of bonus points. But when we were exposed to the battery of homeworks, long tests and projects with greater levels of difficulty, time was transformed from being a luxury to a scarce commodity. I could still try to submit early but only at the expense of losing time for some other requirement. I feel relieved that I somehow struck the balance the whole four-years since I submitted every work on time (except the Science Scholar!). I couldn't have done so if cramming was still not part of my tools. Time management and prioritization really didn't suffice when time was just insufficient and everything was on the same level. The tactic was to be reactionary - getting ahead was just too costly. I study only what is necessary and indulge my intellectual curiousity when nothing is at stake any more.

The constant weight of academic and extra-curricular life in Pisay trained me how to deal with stress - not to fear it but use it as a weapon. I've always been proud of the fact that I work better under pressure. Sometimes, I deliberately constrict time allotment for a project so that it would end up better in the end (and would actually be more fulfilling)- which usually happens. The problem is I got so used to it, sometimes, unconsciously, I seek that pressure to motivate me to work. For example, there's a lab report due on a Monday and it's just a Friday. The grade-school me would react by working on the lab report on a Friday and hope that I finish it early so it won't consume my whole weekend (which sometimes happens). The high-school me would do the opposite. Relax and unwind Friday night to Saturday afternoon, preview the work ahead Saturday night and actually work on it Sunday. Without the pressure of "wow, one day na lang pala", I wouldn't push myself to work.

Before I came to Pisay, I would take every step to make sure everything is ready for an activity (this usually applies with my extra-curricular stuff like the school paper or student council). But because of the scarcity of time in Pisay, elaborate preparation turned from necessity to luxury. And near the end of my stay in Pisay, I find myself struggling to push myself to invest more time in preparing. The good side is combined with my propensity to work better under pressure, any problem encountered was just easier to solve. Fortunately, this has never happened but I'm sure there will come a moment where there is a problem that's just impossible to addrees except if I had prepared for it.

So, my struggle now is to be able to control these new "abilities". Sure, these gave me an edge in Pisay but will it be a liability in the next stages of my life? I feel that this summer I must learn to establish a switch so that I could revert from one attitude to the other.

I also believe that setting-up that conscious switch ability would be important if I will survive the totally different environment of college life. I am confident God will guide me closely in this next stage and I trust He will help me fix this problem.

Amazing what typing for almost a week can make you realize.

ILC entry next na talaga. hahaha.

The Beginning

2007-04-16T20:46:00.000-07:00

Finally! A blog of my own. :D

The reason I want to blog is because these days, I've become so forgetful, especially of my thoughts or ideas regarding anything. haha. I've developed a memory bank capable of storing trivia like who created Middle-Earth or which countries fell to the German blitzkrieg but not phone numbers, names of acquiantances and everyday events. But these things are not for the blog but for my phonebook. :p

The things I will write about will be those of significance to me - things that have attracted my attention or have sent a lot of nerve impluses across my nervous system especially in the cerebrum. I will write about my thoughts on stuff happening in my life and others happening around me.

When I hear about something interesting, I really think about it and sometimes when the right person asks, I can refine my ideas. Unfortunately, after that moment of enlightenment, I usually forget the essential parts. And I feel it's such a loss because I think some of those thoughts I've lost to the immense burden of Pisay life include important lessons - not about LDMU or Redox reactions - but real life lessons - stuff you don't learn in the classroom and don't come to everybody.

So I hope this blog will help me remember those lessons.

Thanks to Ray-ray for the helping me with the title. :D

Clouds are my favorite subjects when I take pictures. Believe it or not, when looking at pictures, I remember the events usually not by the personalities but the setting - building, trees, cars, roads, clouds. The great thing about clouds is that it provides great contrast so it's very easy to get a good picture. But the best thing I like about them is that you can never capture the same moment twice. You can do that with architecture or people but never with clouds. Clouds just drift away so fast you are only given one fleeting moment to seize the memory of it. Parang yung thoughts ko noh? :p

Many people have been pushing me to blog and I've really wanted too. I used to have one but it didn't turn out the way I wanted it so I just stopped blogging afterwards. So why start now?

I'm really a sucker for grand stuff. My obsession for fireworks, Lord of the Rings and other stuff that are just so big, epic and grand just proves this. I've been waiting for the perfect moment to start one and this is it. I just came from the 14th YFC - International Leaders' Conference and I would say it is the one of the best events of my life. And there is no grander timing than this. haha.

So yun na lang. haha. Quite a long first post noh? Thank God I finally have a blog. :D